Addicted to Traveling

Crazy days

2012-02-12T22:13:00.003-08:00

I don't have much energy to write but here is a short update:

- projects, presentations, papers, reading, writing, grading, teaching, learning

This is what the past two months have been and the next one will be.

Despite the overhwhelmingness, I love being a student and I love being a teacher! Non-stop until graduation... gulp... 32 days away.

Two weeks "off" after that, but I plan to dedicate most of that time to my April gigs:

On the job front... gonna work an outdoor ed gig in early April on the Olympic Peninsula. Then filling in as a substitute teacher for a 3rd/4th grade class for three weeks during the rest of that month. Pretty stoked on these opportunities. They'll be fun... and I'll get paid!!!! Finally!

Get to cat/house sit during April too in Mt. Vernon. "Yes!" for two weeks in the farmland with quiet, birds and a wood-stove to keep things warm* (*if it hasn't warm up by then)

Then... the future is relatively wide open. I have an interview in two weeks for a 6th Grade teacher position for next school year. I'll go in with a positive attitude and be myself (and polite!) and let the winds of destiny send me away or keep me in Washington.

Looking forward to some freedom and time... It has been awhile actually. From Japan straight into grad school. Damn near five years on the run! All fun, but certainly structured. I need a framework to guide me, indeed, but I may yet get a short spell of time to clear up some projects and clean up my life a little.

I'm looking forward to a summer of adventures and personal consolidation. And I'm trying to make that the priority... not a job (necessarily) and not any major endeavors to pursue. It's true that I have lived most of my life to have a good time with relatively little responsibility... and after all this time, I am ready to get more focused. :)

First step is to reflect on my decade of young fun! Maybe I can do that in the mountains this summer....

from the weekend

2012-01-30T21:57:00.004-08:00

Berner came up last weekend on a cheap Allegiant flight from the Bay Area... we proceeded to enjoy some brews and get ready for snowboarding. Long story short... lots of good runs on Saturday. Sunday started off rainy and then eventually came around to snow. We embraced the cold and wet (I was completely drenched, base layer and all, by day's end) and everyone left the mountain, leaving us with fresh powder runs over and over again. We'd take a line and the snow filled them up by the time we got back to the top. "Epic" is a pretty apt descriptor of the weekend, riding at Mt. Baker, and time well spent with a good friend.

waking up on Martin Luther King day...

2012-01-16T09:44:00.001-08:00

to this view outside my front door:

pictures of recent adventures

2012-01-09T22:18:00.006-08:00

Birthday party courtesy of my Tribe! Big numba 3-0!

Jake visited for 10 days. It was wonderful. This is us south of UBC on a day we decided to have Vietnamese food for lunch in Vancouver.

Most of the crew who was at Mt. Baker on Dec. 30th, which was a pretty epic powder day!

I've been birding a lot recently... this is my favorite recent one: A Snowy Owl (Bubo scandiaca) and Great Blue Heron (Ardea herodias) searching for voles around 10am in Boundary Bay Regional Park, British Colombia. If I had a sweet, expensive camera I'd have some action shots from when the heron snapped at an owl that was in its way! Great spot, awesome light with heavy clouds and the sun rays filtering through the bottoms like molten rock pouring out of the sky... with the Cascades and Mt. Baker looming on the horizon. A great way to spend a Sunday morning.

The reason I came to Washington. The Bald Eagle, Haliaeetus leucocephalus washingtoniensis. This is a sub-adult... maybe 3-4 years old. Didn't even move when I pulled over my car not 20 feet from it. It was on a lower pole, so I could actually get a decent shot. Still, I could get a better camera. Also from Boundary Bay.

new blog header

2011-12-13T21:27:00.002-08:00

The blogger is down right now for me (probably because I haven't gotten the new interface) so this is the picture that will soon grace my header:

Grey skies and clear horizons

2011-12-07T22:30:00.002-08:00

It has been tough toward the end of the quarter. Work piles up and has a looming and approaching due date. Crises occur. Parties are planned. Other obligations interject. Yoga loses its everyday practice. Brushing teeth turns into a luxury. Time is short.

And then... BOOM! After lots of coffee, tea and chocolate, minimal sleep but maximum hours toiling in front of a computer screen... it's over. Another school term complete. And a break. I'll do some work during my vacation, but it is personal and enjoyable especially because it'll be on my time and my interests. What the hell, I may even be able to celebrate my birthday!

Snowboarding, birding, reading, writing, Jake in town, birthdays, sleeping, eating, cooking, plotting, planning and dreaming. Should be a full 25 days!

a poem that saved my life today

2011-12-01T19:33:00.003-08:00

"When I Am Among the Trees"
from Thirst: Poems By Mary Oliver. Boston, MA: Beacon Press. (2006):

When I am among the trees,
especially the willows and the honey locust,
equally the beech, the oaks and the pines,
they give off such hints of gladness.
I would almost say that they save me, and daily.

I am so distant from the hope of myself,
in which I have goodness, and discernment,
and never hurry through the world
but walk slowly, and bow often.

Around me the trees stir in their leaves
and call out, "Stay awhile."
The light flows from their branches.

And they call again, "It's simple," they say,
"and you too have come
into the world to do this, to go easy, to be filled
with light, and to shine."

Thank you Mary Oliver, though I may never meet you.

lingering cough and food coma

2011-11-30T20:54:00.002-08:00

Cough won't go away. I am in a good place though. Went out to dinner... too much food. An hour evening nap... Writing this blog and then to bed rather early! One week to go in this quarter and the work laid out in front of me. Start chippin' away tomorrow.

One for my hommie, the real Eagle

2011-11-30T11:41:00.003-08:00

This is for last night!
Inspirational night... getting through my sickness. Almost there. Rather quick recovery... that is a great sign about how healthy I (think I) am.
Nice to speak with Scott about our dreams to transform our homeland into a greener one... albeit still densely populated.
Caught sight of an owl around 10pm and stalked it (though it wasn't fooled at all) as it flew and perched in gloomy conifers.
Thanked and appreciated the woman whose garden inspires me every time I walk by it. She was rather scared (I am rather unkempt and it was late at night) but smiled as she shut the door quickly. Oh well, got that feeling out of my head.
Sleep was good and my project work is done... a small presentation to do today, and I will sort of "wing it." I have some things I'd like to say, but I am by no means an expert... just a curious reader.
Two years ago I applied for this grad program. And here I am. With much more insight and content than I would have ever imagined.
Pete died about three years ago. He would be 29 today. I would be laughing about how the Eagles won't make the playoffs and he would be telling me to fuck off while downplaying the Steelers. It would be nice to talk with him.
May I live in a way today that would make him proud to be my friend.

blast- another two days

2011-11-29T07:55:00.002-08:00

Oy, I have been under the weather. so, no blogging. Moreover, Elaine was visiting from Vancouver and I spent most of my time on the couch reading and writing a paper for class and away from the internet. Thus, no blog. Oy. I even said out loud that I wouldn't forget to do it last night. But I certainly did!

Getting through this sickness, caused certainly by lack of sleep before Thanksgiving, in relatively short time. And back to the grind. Another paper done, another presentation to create, more paper to write and more presentations to deliver. I can see the end and it looks awesome. I can see the tremendous workload for next quarter looming in the distance, waiting for January to unleash a torrent of busy-ness onto me... but even that is kind of exciting!

Jake gets here in just over two weeks and we will have a good time up here together. It will be cold, but there may be snow to ride, birds to see, Vancouver to visit and other things to eat, see and do in Bellingham for 10 days. Looking forward to that, for sure!

kinda sick

2011-11-26T22:00:00.000-08:00

bleh... sinus blocks on flights are awful too. I'll get better sometime soon. sleep.

weird sleep... not a lot of it and BEAUTIFUL CALIFORNIA!

2011-11-23T22:12:00.003-08:00

Slept at 11:20pm... woke up at 2:45AM! Drove to the airport for my 5am flight, connected in Seattle (pouring rain) slept on a bench in front of the gate and then again on the airplane. Thought I might actually die on the first leg because the turbulence was non-stop, I felt sick to my stomach (never had happened to me on a plane before) and the plane teetered a dozen times as we landed and eventually slowed down into strong winds and driving rain. Arrived 9:30am... & GO!

Love Mom for picking me up (and for busting my balls all day). Drew and I went to Newport, got fabulous fish burritos at Bear Flag, spent some time by the beach... I almost grabbed a Great Blue Heron (the closest I have ever gotten to one, actually), saw the PELICANS! Some tiny cormorants, and even some dolphins glistening in the 78-degree sun! Great day.

Some reading, dinner with the family.. it's awesome to be with Mom, Dad, and Jake. No Charlie... so that is kind of sad. But I saw his ashes and his water/food bowls are there still-- nostalgia indeed. RIP to you kind, quiet, black friend.

Shame on Nancy Steiger, Shame on St. Joseph's Medical Center in Bellingham, Shame on PeaceHealth

2011-11-22T21:43:00.003-08:00

Shame on Nancy Steiger Chief Executive Officer of St. Joseph's Medical Center in Bellingham, Washington. Her selfish efforts to make money have undermined the mission and core values of the hospital and its partners.

No longer is PeaceHealth St. Joseph's providing relief to pain and suffering; rather is is enabling pain and suffering. PeaceHealth is irresponsible for permitting her actions that deny support for the nurses who comfort patients in its care.

Their negligent behavior to make a profit puts my life and the lives of my friends at risk. Their monetary gain is not justifiable in undercutting community health and risking lives.

Shame on Nancy Steiger, St. Joseph's Medical Center in Bellingham, and PeaceHealth for endangering the lives of those who live in Bellingham and Whatcom county.

too busy to blog...

2011-11-22T00:00:00.002-08:00

ahh, I was so busy, I forgot to write this 10 minutes ago to get it in for November 21st!

Oy missed two days in a row... yesterday I didn't even remember to do it. Today I have been utterly swamped trying to type myriad papers, resumes, letters, emails, etc. and today has already turned into tomorrow... which is actually today. A little bit of sleep and more writing all day tomorrow.. and some reading... and some packing and then a 3:15am departure on Wed morning for a super early flight... to get me to orange county. Maybe it will be warmer at my parents' house.

And the huge gusts blow loudly late into this evening... in the form of flatulence AND stormy northern latitude winds

short but sweet

2011-11-19T21:27:00.003-08:00

again didnt do any of the work I have to do... oy. But the farmer's market was great and all of the people I ran into were fun to chat with. A short nap and then laundry and dinner with Scott. Football too! Now, onto the work!

missed yesterday but good for today!

2011-11-18T16:50:00.002-08:00

Got to be crazy/madness yesterday... all busy with class and yoga, tea with CeCe and then folks kept arriving and then social support took over and then I went over to Kate and CeCe's for group studying... eventually found myself home at 11:15pm, pretty tired, with reading to do still. So I went to bed.

-----------------

It has been a fulfilling week, with much social and community connectedness. Recently folks have been struggling or looking for guidance. Or simply an ear, or a shoulder. I have been in a very good space recently, so I have no tears to shed besides the empathetic ones. It is because of my present flourishing that I am not only able to help others cope with their troubles, but excited to spend time doing so.

I have put off some work and will have to bust my arse to catch up. I even have to forgo snowboarding this weekend (despite 2 feet of fresh powder!) on the opening of Mt. Baker. And you know what... it is OK. Community needs support and it provides comfort. It is our responsibility to provide that when we are able and to lean on community when we need it.

And I will slow down again, not drive to the mountains (and use the gas), this weekend. More fresh produce from the farmer's market... hopefully to get stuff for another wonderful potato-leek-cabbage soup and make it. Also, this afternoon I went down to the harbor and bought two salmon. A Coho (Keta) [6.5 lbs] and a Pink [3.5 lbs] . For a total of $20. Unbelievable! From the fisherman who caught them last summer outside of Petersberg, Alaska. That's about as "local" as one could do.

did everything but what I needed to read~!

2011-11-16T23:16:00.003-08:00

Exactly that. I am bubbling with positude currently. I am not "happy" and my emotions are more down than up, but I am flourishing and excelling in my attitude and actions. Lots of checking in with people today. I met with the majority of my colleagues and spread the good vibes around. We all need it and some of us have it, so it is a good time to share the wealth. At least for me. Lots of tea tonight with different parties and good discussions. But no reading for class, like I wanted to do.

Per usual Yoga was an amazing start to the day, class and morning work went on just fine and the gym was a tough but rewarding. More pull ups than usual and lots of sweat pouring from the bike regiment. Yoga in the AM tomorrow too and getting up for it is good reason to get some rest now!

I am finally becoming American Dave again. It's weird to recognize the changes in my actions, thoughts, feelings and mannerisms. It almost feels natural to "be myself" after so much time from it. Some very crucial elements still resonate with "other" cultures in my head, but I laughed on the walk home at my Americanized self. It is not good or bad, better or worse... but blending in and now I have the freedom to explore that self, sustain its commonalities compared with other contexts and flourish in my energy passions and knowledge. Makes sense to me.

excellence

2011-11-15T22:14:00.003-08:00

Today was superb. Though I didn't get out of bed early like I could have and felt that I was running late, I managed to indeed cook the Spanish omelet that I had prepared for. Thus, I didn't waste food. I got to Yoga early which was a grounding experience (and lately has been). Class was nice and then just got it done today. Reading, resume, assignments and then got a SWIM in! That was awesome.

I forgot how wonderful it is to glide in the water. I was definitely out of breath really fast, but my form is improving slowly in just two sessions! I can see and feel the differences. I have to work on stamina, but it is a fun activity. Yet another way to utilize the gym, keep myself active and break up the lulls in studying, reading and class. Another great, although late, evening class also.

Today was excellent.

ahhh, didnt read today!

2011-11-14T21:27:00.002-08:00

OK, So I didn't read this evening like I had anticipated. Nick came over and we conversed for a LONG time. That's OK. I didn't go to the gym either. But that's OK. I realized how far behind I am in class... and that is OK. OK.

Calmly to sleep and early to wake up? Plenty of work that I have to do... and it is out for me to see. Boy is it intimidating!

long up and a lull and then an up

2011-11-13T22:01:00.002-08:00

I totally felt the energy flow and ebb today. Woke up and got a lot done (probably ill-timed) with a certification I am trying to earn with the Institute. One more requirement left and then I have to compile all of the work I've done. I have the blueprint, but have to go through and save all of the files to a CD... as soon as I am done with an article (that I need to write and get published!)

Then on to a great smelling soup. Potato-leek... with garlic and then in with celery and cabbage. I am gonna blend it in the morning and it should be ample thick! I hope it tastes good... it certainly smells that way.

Lulled in the afternoon. Nick came over for a cup of tea and then went on his way. I tried to do schoolwork but closed my eyes. And then I woke up to try again, so I read for another 4 minutes... then off to sleep. After a 24 minute cat nap, I knew I had to get up. Went to the gym.. first time out of my apartment was at 4:05pm... but I got on that bike and pushed it and did some exercises and stretching and then felt awesome after a shower. Remembered to turn off the water while soaping up! That was awesome too.

On my way to the bus stop when Clint and Alexandra stopped their car and offered to drive me. Instead of going home I had them drop me at the co-op because I needed ground chicken. Got to the bus stop and realized that there were no more buses for the night. So I called them up, joined them for dinner at Boundary Bay and watched the Pats beat the Jets handily. That made Clint just giddy.

I prepped some veggies for tomorrow and am ready to rock. Still way behind on my reading, but that is OK. I am in a good place, even though I can't readily smile. Well-being is high, even though the positive emotion aspect of that is a bit lower than last week. Relationships, Achievements and the other two aspects are good.

Ready for 7am Yoga with Maya and a swim sometime tomorrow before class too... lots of reading and studying to do. Set to go!

misc photos

2011-11-13T08:38:00.003-08:00

Don't know the name of this flower

Haliaeetus leucocephalus

A fly-by

Mt. Baker looms to the east from Semiahmoo Spit

yoga, gym, sushi

2011-11-12T20:19:00.003-08:00

Yoga in the morning. Gym from 11:20~2:00: basketball, SWIMMING, jacuzzi, and some other games in the gym. Boy I am OUT OF SHAPE! Maybe fit-looking, but certainly winded by the lightest workout. I have work to do. A nap after I gorged myself and then sushi with Scott, Clint and Alexandra. Wanna go to sleep, but I am awake now... and have work that I could do too. Oy. Ohh, where to begin with the workload at 8:20pm? From right here!

good thursday

2011-11-10T22:02:00.002-08:00

Went to be super early last night and thought I met get up at 5:15... not quite what happened, in fact I was still tired at 6:30 when I actually got up.

Did my reading, which is still enjoyable and then yoga (I love!) and class. Elizabeth came back here with me and we had a simple lunch and an afternoon on Bellingham Bay- just shooting the shit. Then I joined my colleagues from Ad theory at a middle school where I learned from the principal about what life is like as the head administrator at a unique school. I don't know if that kind of work is for me... it was good to see what it can be like!

Not much to report besides an overall sense of happiness and good feelingness. That is something important to recognize because I have downer days too. It's valuable to recognize that life is peaches and cream... so when it is more mushrooms and shellfish I can remember the sweet times too.

sleep early

2011-11-09T20:54:00.002-08:00

Long day yesterday, kinda loopy at the end of it all and trying to converse with Wayne about winter plans... fail on my part. No energy left.

Spoke with Gordo today about good work that he is doing, that I am doing, that we are all (capable of) doing.

Yoga this morning with Maya was lovely. Some school work... not nearly enough! and some paperwork which is done forever I hope. And a killer workout... I was in the gym for much longer than I anticipated, but shredded the bike and got in an extra set of push-ups too--- that was rad. Jacuzzi where I ran into Teresa and chatted for a minute. Then home to food that was ready to go. Gotta read before going to class tomorrow, but I think going to bed is the better option and then waking up early (and probably naturally) to get the work done. Listen to the body...

Post #300

2011-11-08T22:24:00.002-08:00

Or so the counter says.

Flourish by Martin Seligman. Worth your while.

I'm tired again. A long Tuesday. But I am getting through the work and enjoying it... and it is hard to be a graduate student. A life-long student. And it is a worthwhile life to always be learning. I hope to carry this theme with me... and to never stop. Even when I am tired.

And in Zen tradition... when we are the most tired is the best time to practice. When we are too cold or too hot it is the best time. When we are busy, it is the best time to practice. It is always the best time to practice (or to study, read and be good.)

blocked

2011-11-07T21:17:00.003-08:00

meant to write earlier when I was feeling energetic. didn't happen. got to cooking. too much time on my feet today in the kitchen. new chicken soup recipe. too much effort. i need a bigger pot! that would have halved the time! Still not done. do it in the morning.

tomorrow i have to teach a lesson on a chapter in a book. the moral of the chapter: you can prepare and study (myriad lists provided) leadership but it doesn't matter when the push comes to shove. What is there to teach? how can I do it with some activities? power point is BORING and I refuse to use it for my presentation. even though it is for adults, I KNOW they need some action and innovation in their lives right now... I certainly do. But I am not sure how to make it work! And I am sitting on my arse trying to figure it out... errgh.

today was a remarkable day though. Lots of positive accomplishments and lucky timings too. And still trying not to use the heat.

Mental block. Oy.

fun day and all about me

2011-11-06T19:15:00.003-08:00

So selfish I was today...

Woke up at 5:15, thinking it was 6:15... yay daylight savings time.

Shaved and cleaned up my apartment, filled up my tank (hopefully for the month) and picked up Clint. Swung by to get CeCe also and we went to Semiahmoo Spit to look at birds. It is a small strip of land in Blaine, WA directly across from the Canadian border. Sure was cold first thing in the morning, but we managed to see lots of cool winged ones: Great Blue Heron, Harlequins, Buffleheads, Grebes, both White-winged and Surf Scoters, Northern Harriers, Black-capped Chickadees, Spotted Towhee, Crested Merganser, Mallards, Pelagic Cormorants, Gulls of all sorts, a Bald Eagle, Ravens, Starlings, two different sparrows, Northern Flickers (and a dead one in my trunk... ahh, I gotta go get that!) and a couple more that I don't remember right now. Wow, we sure did see a bunch, now that I look over that list!

Dropped them off and got ready for a rock climbing class. One of the perks of university is that there are a bunch of cheap classes for students... so I am trying to take what I can! Lead Climbing and Belay was it today. And I was the only one who signed up! So, I had a 2.5 hr private lead climbing lesson (for only $25.) Whooo-weeee, was it scary! And then I had to belay my instructor (who I am sure was ten years younger than me!) I got to set anchors for myself and self-rappel as he looked over my shoulder, but I got it done on my own! I still have some practicing to do in order to make it go smoother, but I managed all the gear properly. Such a great feeling. But it adds another dynamic to my rock climbing activity.

Got to listen to and watch some Steelers/Ravens while making and eating dinner. Fried & breaded rainbow trout, homemade french fries, sauteed Brussels sprouts and rice... and I am a little more full than I ought to be. I want to watch the rest of the game, but I probably should read because I obviously did no school work today. Pretty pumped.

Another note: it would be nice to pick up cute ladies on Friday and Saturday nights. But that is not my style... so I will go about climbing and gyming and reading and working and not worry about the "social" life that bothered me so much over the weekend. Like that Z-trip track, "Just Doin' My Thang."

slow down, sleep, rest... really and reset

2011-11-05T17:18:00.002-07:00

That's what it took. Sleep... rest, waking up late into an already gorgeous sunny Bellingham morning. To the farmer's market where I ran into a lot of colleagues. Got food for the next week or so and lots of plans for great soups: potato-leek-kale, homemade chicken soup. I got home and picked up my book and after a chapter took a nap. Next thing I know it is 4pm and gorgeous still. Perfect situation for a kayak... but my shoulder feels weird and I didn't have time to warm-up or stretch. So I decided a walk along the coast was better. Lots of people, lots of concrete on the dock and sidewalks, but the birds still fly and swim looking for fish. They reminded me that I love the coast and the wildlife and that I should make an effort to get there more often.

Enter a conflict: I am trying to use less gasoline. I don't want to drive far at all and make efforts to not use my car. In fact, I haven't put gas in my car tank since the end of September. But tomorrow I'll have to fill up as I want to head to the birds at the border... and center myself again.

I wrote yesterday about not being the social butterfly I once was. Well, that was a REALLY long time ago actually. If I accurately recall, then I'll see the pattern that indeed I am a loner. Lots of traveling solo, bird watching and dinners by myself, random snowboard and hiking days just me. So, I can accept that I have spent much of my life on my own. And that is OK too. So, I now have a better perspective of where I am. And it took the coast and the birds (not to mention some sunshine and rest) to remind me that all is well and that there are no stressful aspects of my life anyhow.

And not to worry about finding or making friends. It is a slow process for me. And the friends I make are gems also, so I shouldn't go about making some just to fill the time and space. The true energy will arrive and maintain me when it does. :) And then I look to the quote on the side of my blog from Castaneda and I settle down even more. Energy is what is important... not how it is decorated.

great day and the deeper reflection...

2011-11-04T23:48:00.010-07:00

Killed it today. Finished the book, finished the paper, ran the seminar (with a great team) and felt good after a solid fist pump in the late afternoon sun as I walked home. Cleaned up my apartment for the most part, organized life for the next week, and took care of business for my personal life. Did not go to the gym, but got a couple of walking minutes in today. And look forward to a rest tomorrow.

Was invited for dinner with Nick and Teresa. Played a board game called something "of Catan." It was fun indeed, in part, because I won. But it was nice to get together with some good folks... really. I missed the social aspect of my week. And probably in my life.

It is hard to be so honest in a public forum, but this is the way this blog is designed. I am in a difficult place because personally I am succeeding. I am following my passion, I am in a good location and am safe and secure. But I have a hard time in the social world.

From being away in my own country and abroad, I feel like I am where I left off after university. Basically, after seven years of putzing around and adventuring, I feel like I am 23 still. Problem is that I am not. I am nearly 30. The numbers don't matter so much, but the experience and differences in my head do. Combine this with being intellectually stimulated currently about environmental and large-scale issues and being well-traveled and I begin to think and talk like I am older than my age.

The massive gap in my developments (or my perceived feelings about it) renders me slightly helpless. I still can't fit into the culture that surrounds me. It seems awkward and I can't even fake wanting to be a part of it or understanding it. Further, I pigeonhole myself and haven't put myself out there to look for groups that share similar hobbies.

I am turning into the "individualistic" person that I read about this week without really wanting to. I appreciate the collective culture especially when it has similar intentions to those I hold, but I am struggling to find a fit into a community in which I feel comfortable. I know that they are out there, but something inside me is holding me back which holds me back even more... Awkward, I know. And I entrench myself into the good feelings that I evoke from following my passions... and that relegates me even further from groups of people.

Maybe the book just got to me; but maybe it brought to light that I am successful in one arena in my life and abysmal in another. (Not to be hard on myself; I chose that word because it is cool!) Whereas I used to be a social butterfly, I find myself now flying upward towards truth and meaning and less side-to-side meeting others. The more I climb, the fewer there are to the side with whom to relate. And I am doing it myself. I used to be able to break the ice, but lost that ability and am curious as to where it went or how to re-learn it.

I have gotten really shy. I have come to value listening and am OK with silence... I guess this isn't appropriate in a social setting, but that is where I am at. I don't want to belabor the point. Getting this out is good. Putting it in public makes me more forward (or perhaps more shy because it is in written words and not vocalized...?)

When I go out in public I rush to get home because I feel weird in those spaces. Never used to be like that. I guess I liked cafes in Europe, so I'd spend time in them. I enjoyed riding my bike around Japan, so I would frequent restaurants and have routines. But I am really struggling to find a groove in the country that I call home.

The same debate flares up... it is about staying put or moving around. I think I am a nomad and have been trying to avoid those traits. But I also like the easy sedentary lifestyle of staying in one place. It just doesn't feel right. I get the urge to go and then the urge to settle down. This is hard to balance. Maybe I need to stop typing and simply get some sleep...

Battling through cold and sickness and heavy work load, but with a positive mental attitude!

2011-11-03T21:08:00.004-07:00

Heat Wave by Eric Klinenberg is a book about the failure of a society to support its citizens. With over 733 deaths, many of whom were elderly citizens, communities did not respond. And reading about a mass burial of 68 of them, all without next of kin or family to identify them, is the final thought I have before crawling into bed tonight... to pray for some sleep so that I can wake up early and write a short report about the book. Eight hours of reading... just three hours left to write three pages and another three hours of facilitating class. The end of this week is near. I yearn for Shabbat and the rest that it demands.

on overdrive

2011-11-03T00:41:00.002-07:00

lots of reading and writing. From 6:15am to 12:45am (next day)... and a couple more minutes to go still. Tomorrow is gonna be a rough one too... but I'm getting there. Alive and kicking. Thank you electronic music (including BT right now) and caffeine (roasted green tea)!

tired

2011-11-01T21:49:00.002-07:00

I knew it was coming and I am tired... about to brush the teeth and head to sleep. Early wake-up, lots of reading and writing. Class. Finish a paper and read as much as possible. Then it'll be another similar post tomorrow asking myself to do it yet again. It's OK, in fact, enjoyable. Just a lot of work and long days. Almost back to full health... by this Shabbat I will be able to rest and relax- the way the day was designed.

busy busy

2011-10-31T22:01:00.003-07:00

no joke. back to the grind. read, write, read, class, read, errands, read.

tomorrow is more of the same: wake-up early, read, class, class, read, class, sleep. Long day(s) a'comin'!

forgot my camera

2011-10-30T22:02:00.002-07:00

Went to the airport at 4am last Saturday morning. Clint asks if I have forgotten anything... I say a four-letter word when realizing that my camera was not packed. Gave me an opportunity to focus on teaching and following-through with a successful week on the annual national parks tour. Great to teach students, great to teach teachers, great to see friends, great to be in the desert Southwest United States, one of the coolest (temperature varied!) places on earth.

no time to blog

2011-10-21T20:35:00.002-07:00

gotta run... off to Harker for a week!

Tomorrow is Phoenix.... then Sedona, Flagstaff, Grand Canyon, Kayenta, Navajo reservation, Monument Valley, Kanab, Bryce Canyon, Zion Canyon, Las Vegas, Red Rocks.

Catch you on Halloween! Peace. Dave.

better but not?

2011-10-20T22:41:00.002-07:00

Back is feeling better. Jacuzzi, yoga, repeat. I have to take it easy and focus on each movement. Conscious behavior is the only way to health.

I have a canker sore developing... does that mean I am getting sick? I noticed it yesterday and perhaps some recent cold weather has encouraged this. And not sleeping as well as I should be...? A toast to health... I would like it to last for a while.

Tomorrow is another strong end to the week. A long day of errands, class and a speaker I'd like to see. Then packing up and shipping off to the desert for a week with the gang.Looking forward to another great national parks tour and gonna try a bunch of stuff I learned this year!

Today was another strong day. Up at 5:15 out of bed at 5:30. I could use more sleep, but I was ready to go. A couple of small naps this afternoon helped me catch up on the day. Funny note about napping recently. I have been crashing really hard after lunch. I'm sure it has to do with my body lacking resources from a small breakfast and workout before class. I need to eat a little more in the morning so that I can sustain through the long Tuesday and Thursday morning blocks I have scheduled for myself.

In the dehydrator currently: carrots and turnips. I have never eaten turnips before... so I will make them into chips. I misread the directions and thought it could go overnight. turns out it will be a 2 hours project and I'll have to stay up later than expected. I can move the morning back slightly to accommodate.

My Yoga instructor this morning reminded us about things that hold us back from enjoying the present moment. I visualized the stack(s) of books in my room. And how I wrote yesterday about reading them and so on. Well, one day at a time. It is nothing to worry about. And neither is using all of the food I bought. These are small issues and certainly nothing that should cause stress. The books will get read and the food will get used or composted (hopefully not). I have to slow down, stretch it out and go about my business.

Another thing to read now, but it's for fun!

worthless wednesday

2011-10-19T22:30:00.002-07:00

I woke up well-rested and ready to go. it was 5:47am. I chose not to get up... until 8am.

That set the day in a way that made me feel like I was running late. A sense of urgency that never amounted to much. I came home in a rush to save my laundry from the rain that only started to fall as I write this at 10:30pm. Then I figured to get some reading done... and took a small nap instead. So, I am still in a bind to read it all.

I guess life could be worse. I have food in my belly, and a roof over my head. And blankets to keep me warm. If I don't read everything that I am assigned or that I would like, is it really that bad? No. No, it is not.

I just want to keep pressing on. One day at a time. And read as much as I can!

another good day

2011-10-18T21:52:00.002-07:00

jacuzzi and yoga to start today also. a long day of classes and a great afternoon with Elizabeth and then Elaine. Eliz and I had tea and then Elaine, who I met 10 years ago at UCLA, stopped by on her way from Seattle back to her new home in Vancouver. We lunched and tea'd and talked and it was delightful. Sunny afternoon patio experience. Lots of sun today. Who would have thought? It was fun to talk about Uganda, Japan, Chile, Costa Rica... and all the other places we have been and lived in the past 10 years. And oddly enough we are involved in similar studies now even though our paths divulged so differently in the past. For "the nature."

strong showing today

2011-10-17T21:26:00.002-07:00

my back still aches, but that yoga... man, I'll tell you. Stretch it out and breathe into every tendon. Inhale the pain and exhale the deepness of the depth of fabric in interlocking cells that make up the muscles... a calm breathing and intentional focus on the body leads to a strong showing. Even getting up at 5:30am after not sleeping well because a cauldron of sauce is brewing through the night- worried about it burning or a fire... all for naught. Jacuzzi to loosen up that cold, northwest body and then into the yoga practice. May everyday start off so calmly and focused. Feeling confident about a day that I thought was doomed from the beginning. Release into sleep.

still pain

2011-10-16T22:07:00.002-07:00

My back still hurts. Ow. I sat and read all morning and then wrote a paper till the mid afternoon. Boy was my back frozen in place. I am on the Ibuprofen train and plan to keep that constant in my life until the tenderness subsides somewhat. Went to the gym and straight to the jacuzzi. That might be a good remedy too and slowly stretching it out. Yoga tomorrow morning is the plan too.

I was sad today because it would was the PERFECT day for kayaking. Sunny, no wind all day. Clear. Alas, I sat docked. Such is life. Gotta take care of myself and it's a humbling reminder that I can't always do what I want. I have to slow down sometimes. Grrrr.

So, I embarked on the tomato sauce adventure. Borrowing a CAULDRON from Kate, I put in all the required ingredients. I think it's 22 lbs (pounds) of tomatoes, 2.5 lbs of onions, 4 head of garlic, a head of celery, six large carrots, two bunches of fresh basil, six bay leaves (laurel) which I took out after not too long, small amounts of salt and pepper- though this was wasteful because it isn't needed until the VERY end, and a lot of washing to do!

Now for the grandest experiment of all... turn it to low/simmer and go to bed. Expecting the water to slowly evaporate and not burning while I sleep. I'll get up early and check on it too. Fortunately, the smoke detector is just outside the kitchen and it will let me know if there are any major problems!

kayaks and cantelopes

2011-10-15T20:20:00.004-07:00

Got a little bit of reading done today. I keep finding themes of ethics and morals involved in teaching and in environmental education. So be it. I will teach people how to be good people. I dig that.

Long walk along the coast again this morning. To the Farmer's Market where I spent quite a bit more time than I had expected. Stopped past the Co-op first because the F.M. still wasn't open and got some good fish, per my usual requests- Coho and a whole rainbow trout again (more expensive but they went and got it for me specially... it's also bigger than the last one!)

Upon returning to the Market, I went straight to the lady with the best melons in the joint (excuse the crude humor) and proceeded to buy $17 worth of melons. Only one honeydew in the bunch of 12 that I bought in total. Later on why I bought so much of this particular fruit.

Then I saw a box of tomatoes and thought about making sauce. Well, long story short is that the entire box was for sale... so I bought the whole thing (22 pounds). Then I bought huge onions, garlic aplenty, basil, celery and carrots so that the sauce can happen. It turns out to be about $50 worth of stuff now that I think of it. I'll get some ground chicken which should set me back another $25 and then I'll have $75 worth of homemade, organic, healthy tomato sauce for pasta. My goal is to dehydrate it and have it ready for camping.

After reading this afternoon, I had some daylight and space on my patio. So I cut all of the melons and prepped them for dehydration:

They averaged about the size of a shot put "ball"

One of eight trays. About one melon per tray.

Here are the honeydew slices.

Then I got word from my landlady that the local garden was closing for the season. I rushed over there 30 minutes before close and just went for it. A 30 pound box of red potatoes to get my through the winter and for all of the experiments I want to try. A 20 pound box of honeydew apples for drying and eating. Garlic at $0.10/head. And a couple of those scrumptious donut peaches. We'll see if they are any good.

All in all, I probably spent $200 today on 100 pounds of food including items like: grapes, turnips (never eaten one before-it'll be a fun experience), a whole chicken (from a different local farmer) and eggs from a sweet little old lady (who told me that she won't name her chickens because she doesn't want to have to worry about anything bad happening to them). It will be nice to prepare all of this food eventually and eat like a king in the following weeks as well as on the trail months from now. I'll have to make sure my products last!

---

The sun was setting and I didn't think I'd get to the gym. With the weather being so nice, I decided to go for my first excursion in the kayak. I am still missing the spray skirt, but thought the effort would be worth it.

The wind had slowed down, but it was still rather wavy on the water. After towing my kayak for 15 minutes, I got to the water, and nearly went into it! I have a long way to go with my balance yet. The water was gorgeous and my kayak didn't leak. So everything is cool. Really cool. I got rather wet in the process of loading and bigger waves crashing over the dock.

I decided to turn back after only 5 minutes to make sure I could get out with sunlight left. After all, this was only a test run. Well, I struggled getting the boat out of the water and tweaked my back. Lugging it back uphill didn't help either. A long day of lifting and awkward carrying: fruits, vegetables, kayaks... and I finally had it. I even dug in the soil to bury my compost... so, my back has told me that enough is enough. I am icing my lower back, after sustaining a small strain perhaps. I plan to take it easy and let the body re-coop from a lot of work. On to some reading and resting.

The last picture is from the maiden voyage.... it was really pretty out there!

sunny and nice sunset

2011-10-14T20:23:00.002-07:00

it was a pretty sunset. calm pink, orange, yellow sandwich on the horizon. afternoon tea and discussion with Codi was wonderful. urban naturalizing- corvids, a raptor (sharp-shinned hawk or maybe the Merlin--- now I am not sure what I saw last week!), gulls, looking at coloring leaves. Japanese and big leaf maples are quickly changing. ahh... not a lot to report. Lots of reading... lots of reading! More reading to do, boy I'll tell ya.

I hope to buy a lot of stuff tomorrow that I can dry in the new dehydrator. And most of the kayak gear is in! So, hopefully, I'll be able to take the boat out on Sunday! Lots of reading to do because I have to get ahead an entire week. Next Saturday I'm heading to the Southwest for the annual Harker trip. Excited to see the crew and to spend time in the desert!

It'll be nice to sleep early and rock it tomorrow! Here's to the end of a long week.

oops, missed one

2011-10-13T07:54:00.002-07:00

i missed blogging yesterday. i erased it on my planner and was in the process of doing it... but that involves signing onto email which must have played a part in my forgetting.

A bird just flew into the window in front of me as I was typing.

Dehydrator arrived yesterday. The rest of the kayak stuff should arrive shortly. My toys are in and now it's time to use them!

With Erin and Maya: Yoga yesterday and in 15 minutes I leave for Yoga class today. It's so nice to stretch in the morning... reawakening the soul and putting the body in position to be successful in its endeavors of transportation, action, sitting... whatever comes its way, it should be ready.

Here is my thought for the day: Watch the crows play from a window-side computer seat... they are truly inspiring. That, and go outside to breathe the same air that they do. What's it like to be a Corvid? (that is a term worth looking up!)

stretch it out

2011-10-11T22:12:00.002-07:00

Moonsetting over the Puget Sound around 6:45am. It is the harvest moon but bidding us farewell instead of reminding us that it autumn approaches.

Clouds and rain remind us that we are alive and that the world is a dynamic flow of energy and forces we can't control.

Get out early, train the body to rise early to test its limits, to elongate the physique. Stretch out that body fully from the crown of the head down the in-line spine and through the coccyx. Extending opposite arms and legs tests that capability and ability to relax the shoulders that tighten up so quickly. Not easy?

Humbling first thing in the morning to remind us that we should not take for granted even one second of the day, too much to do and enjoy. Break open the chest and drop those oh-so-tight shoulders again. You are not as good at this as you think. There is much to learn.

Listen and observe. Contribute where you can, but two ears should double the amount of usage as one mouth, if not more. Ask questions. Volunteer. Pour out the energy and see where it will get you. Read in those free moments... if not to be prepared for class, then to grow that grey jelly in the head!

Enjoy sips of coffee in the evening. It is a drug, to be used selectively. The taste is nice, but too much and you won't sleep well! Enjoy discussion late into an already elongated day and embrace technology. Texts, headphones and an mp3 player. But, remember that the hill on which you walk is full of living critters and foliage.

The ocean you can't make out too well in the evening pitch of light breathes with energy and it calms all nerves. Indeed it is a cooling down as you walk down. Down, downhill to home. Clean up after a long day and try to put things in their place, but know that tomorrow is another day, full and ready for us to enjoy, extend and stretch out.

Call it for the evening. Be a good person. Floss. Stretch. Sleep well. Follow your heart.

rainy evening

2011-10-10T20:23:00.003-07:00

With a raincoat a walk in the morning drizzle is not only bearable, but rather enjoyable. To stay dry amidst the softwetness (one word in my world). Then the Great Blue Heron sweeps her long neck to eye you, making sure that you don't get too close. Past the GBH is a floating gull. And the gull on the shore behind you lifts his young head to cry out your presence. But you look at him, "Hey buddy, I'm just passing through."

Continuing along the coast one might then come across a harbor seal with its head floating, looking around, no, wait, there are two of them and it looks like they are dog-paddling to stay at the surface. Of course, they glide quickly and drop below the surface and then they're gone. The walk goes only a little bit further until the railroad tracks. So, turn around, say hello to the same people you greeted on the walk down (you've both reached your ends and have turned back) and then up the hill to home. Stretch it out and practice those new and still awkward Yoga poses and start the day. That seems like a peaceful and energetic way to go about things.

reading and living

2011-10-09T10:03:00.002-07:00

Just read The Road by Cormac McCarthy and it was interesting. The writing style was unique, he didn't use apostrophes in any of his contractions. All of the language was morose and any glimmer of hope was quickly flipped. An example was that all the containers were half-empty, as opposed to half-full. I think the word "ash" was used hundreds of times. It was an interesting tale. I'm not sure what else to write about it. I am happy to have read it. Thanks Jake for giving it to me such a long time ago.
------------

I can't write right now. Laundry-lists of things done... that is what I have been writing. That is not a way to go about things.That is what my planner is for- to plan for and to keep track of things done. This needs to change to more creative measures I hope. I need a little inspiration besides hard work and accomplishing tasks.

animal dreams

2011-10-06T07:07:00.003-07:00

So, I woke up after a second dream in which an animal was approaching me with the desire to attack. In the first dream it was a pair of wolves in the snow. The second one was a mountain lion in suburbia.

I woke up after both. The first one occurred at 5:37am and the second one was around 6:13am. Maybe it was time for me to get up and my unconscious was telling me that I had slept enough. After the first one I was woke up to feeling rather rested, so I pondered it for a minute before allowing the darkness to overwhelm me once again.

My alarm went off after the second one anyways so I used that excuse to get up.

Why animals? I will have to search through Jung to come up with some leads on that. I have never been approached by (wild) animals in dreams. Two predators. One hunts in packs (except for those lone wolves) and the other is a solitary stalker. One is a canine, the other feline. I'll have to ruminate on this a little bit.

----------
in the P.M. before reading one more article for tomorrow's class.

I did a small internet search. There was discussion of "You should use your will power" and "you need to release some aggression." I don't know. I forgot what I read this morning and this evening's search is not something I have patience to explore. My schoolwork is more important at this point. Thus, I will leave it at this. I lived today like it would be my last day ever... like if I were attacked by an animal then I would have been satisfied with my actions and attitude today.

Basketball in the morning was nice followed by Yoga which has been putting me in a great mood. Every Tuesday and Thursday I feel elated. My body feels healthier (except when I douse it with loads of cheese) and freer- to move and to breathe and to be. That puts me in a good mood and then my tasks are enjoyable and fun. And morning workouts are the way to go because there aren't a lot of people in the gym, freedom to use any area without feeling rushed or scrunched.

Got some work done after class and feel good about future appointments with professors to discuss my projects and ideas for the term. Had a nice tea with CeCe at her and Kate's place on the other side of town. Got lots of fresh food for the upcoming week and even saw a Merlin, Falco columbarius, on the way home from the library late in the evening. It was cool because as it flew from tree to tree while I was stalking it (visibly!) I had a chance to observe its behavior and flying habits. (I think it is a Merlin and not a sharp-shinned hawk. It was eyeing a neighbor's yard that is full of chickens, turkeys and other birds!

Then it flew into a tree near a house and as I turned the corner, I saw a Calico house cat stalking on the roof toward the bird! It was a wild situation and it happened 3 minutes walk from my house! I am still involved in nature so long as I open my eyes and look at it! A great feeling for me because I felt overwhelmed last night... stemming from feeling detached from nature. This plugged me right back in!

Reading on through the evening and had a nice dinner- salmon pasta with slices of Parmesan and a basil/tomato salad (no more cheese left!). It was perfect; I loaded up on more veggies by sauteing spinach again... ohh, and FRUIT- I got some more of those delicious pluots! Yum. Gotta read a bit more in order to head to bed at a reasonable hour. Apollo 13 in the morning and maybe a trip to REI before class to get this cool beanie that I didn't buy today (yes, I went there to look for kayak stuff.)

Tomorrow night is Kol Nidrei- chances are I won't write tomorrow or on Shabbat (Yom Kippur). Time to finish a week of reflection. I think I am on the right track. Trying to be conscious of my words- focusing on the truth and being a good person. I make mistakes too, but I recognize them and try to correct them. One day at a time. One action at a time. One moment at a time.

If I have done anything in the past year (or more) to upset you, I am sorry. I think I wrote this in a previous post, but I want to make sure that I say it again. I ask for your forgiveness and will do good this year.

L'Shana Tova :)

From the Transition Hike- Sept 18th ish

2011-10-05T10:04:00.006-07:00

So this is an overdue post about a 3-day, 2-night transition hike that half of the cohort took in order to get our minds wrapped around moving from a rural, remote location where we had been for a year to the big city where there are people everywhere. We had a lot of fun going to the dry, east side of the Cascades... where it was supposed to be warmer but wasn't!

Codi smells deeply into a Ponderosa Pine, Pinus ponderosa. She will kill me when she sees this photo! This tree smells like vanilla or butterscotch (maybe Molasses!) when warmed by the sun.

We hiked to Tiffany Mountain (from 6500 at the trail head to 8100 feet at the summit). This is a famous burn-out zone from a huge forest fire (Tripod Fire) that torched thousands of acres in 2006.

Among the dead trees were flowers... even this late in the blooming season. It was a reminder that even in the midst of death, life exists. In fact, there would be no life without death.

Codi is not my muse, but she was in a good place for me to take a picture. John is in the background, walking towards us. We are at the easternmost point of the Cascades as the mountain range transitions to rolling hills and eventually the Okanagan plateau (high elevation, but flat) behind us. In the background of this picture (looking west) is the northern third of the North Cascades Mountain range (south is left). It was an impressive view as glaciers and snow are still visible. Perhaps a good year for glaciers to have grown. In fact I collected some snow around the corner and threw snowballs at all of my colleagues!

The next morning we stopped by the Cinnamon Twisp Bakery. This is one of the famous "Cinnamon Twisps" though it came out sideways :( Lots of butter, nuts, sugar, cinnamon and dough baked to perfection. It is called a "twisp" instead of a "twist" because that is the name of the town: Twisp.

Four of us walking toward the Beaver Pond: Steph, me, Teresa and Kate

A Mourning Cloak butterfly, Nymphalis antiopa, fluttered about as we walked in the autumn sunshine.

This view made me think of Japan. Even in America there are places designed for observing and recognizing the exquisite views that nature provides. The only thing missing is a small shrine or gate. Still, it was rather "Zen," I felt.

If pictures could describe my transition, then these would do it. Did some camping and cooking, American-style, and it was a lovely way to settle into life in Bellingham after three wonderful weeks in Japan.

slight evening headache

2011-10-04T20:42:00.003-07:00

My head started hurting as I consumed mac and cheese in a restaurant this evening. Ow. I bet it is the quantity (and perhaps quality) of cheese I have eaten lately. I should watch that a bit closer. And I should have gone with fish tacos tonight. Maybe a lack of protein is the cause of this ringing? I'll have a small piece of fish too right now. (I cooked Coho again last night!)

Tomorrow I'll turn in some paper that I have written. FINALLY finished my summer paper. Due only 5 1/2 weeks ago! It's as ready to go as it's gonna be. Along with the 3-page works cited reference list and a lesson plan. It's a nice project that I am proud of.

Also tomorrow is the first paper for THIS quarter. A short reflection for "Foundations of Environmental Education" class on Richard Louv's Nature Principle. It's a good read and inspiring for those of us with any inclination towards the natural world. It is a compilation of various things that folks are doing to integrate their lives more with nature, save money, create peaceful and safe communities and raise the value of life. There are lots of ideas that each of us can pull from this book to make our lives more fulfilling. Really.

Something I read in "Conservation Psychology" class really bugs me. In Clayton and Myers' Conservation Psychology (2009), from a poll to college students, "Although there were some differences depending on the behavior being examined, conservation behaviors were uniformly seen to indicate lower status" (67). These behaviors include: drying clothes on a clothesline, taking public transportation, and recycling.

This explains how I want to live. I suppose that means in the eyes of my peers or neighbors or others, I will be deemed a lower status. Ooooh. Not a big deal for someone like me who is always doing the opposite of everyone anyways. But it bothers me that others, who might be more inclined to care about image, will purposefully NOT do these things because of what "it might say about them to others." I will not hate on those people; indeed image is what some folks need. But the idea that these elements creates a "lower" image SHOULD change because it is wrong.

These actually say: "I care about the earth," "I care about my health," "I care about you and your health too," or simply, "I care." This image must change, and post-haste, because it is false. So, if you see anyone recycling, or drying clothes on a line, composting, taking public transportation, growing vegetables in a garden or raising chickens, then the first thought should be, "that person cares about me because they are minimizing our human impact on this planet." A second thought could be, "how might I mimic them to show others that I care too?"

Wow, I got preachy. But this is it. This is the web space that I have to share my truth. Good night moon!

overcast day and moderately windy

2011-10-03T17:19:00.002-07:00

It was dark when I woke up at 6:17 this morning. I thought that I ought to sleep later, but that would have been counter-intuitive. I had to get up. I had to force myself out of bed. That is a goal of mine- to get out and live- regardless of weather, light or trains blaring horns at 3:30am.

An early gym workout was a great idea too. I had it lined up for my make-up yoga class. Got in some good stretching and blood flow and then changed for yoga. Except, I arrived and was told that the class was not where I thought it was! Oy. Fortunately, I figured out where it was, got permission to change it to the 10am class and then enjoyed learning about Warrior 1. Things always work out if we let them.

Met Nick at the gym on the way home- I wanted to get in some pull ups and push ups before lunch. The short is that we came back to my place and he played the piano (wonderfully!) I had a cup of tea with him, and then another one with Teresa who stopped by to get Nick. And then with Kate who came over to go through some homework. Now it's late in the day and I am full of liquid and still have the second half of Richard Louv's, The Nature Principle to read!

I am looking into the kayaking materials I need now. A skirt and a paddle. Oh, and a set of wheels to get it up and down the hill!

Last night I had a delightful dinner with Clint and Alexandra. I brought over a Caprese salad (using the last of my materials) and we enjoyed Romanian soup (stew) and toasted baguettes with melted brie, roasted garlic butter and sliced prosciutto. It was just perfect. Really. Then we had at it in Scrabble (I pour out some of my 40 for Wendy-chan)... and I had to settle their previous-night's Scrabble-squabble by taking the game by 35 points. "Q-U-I-Z," with "Q" on the double-letter score did me real good!

I have a bunch of paper to read and write this quarter. So much for that personal time I was hoping for! One day at a time... and everyday I can make time for me and for work. I need to remember this lesson. And the balance is dynamic... go with the flow.

now I need a skirt...

2011-10-02T08:46:00.004-07:00

This stack will keep me busy for the next eight weeks. And there are some articles on my computer to read also. I am a professional reader!
The reason for needing a (spray) skirt: It is beat up and maybe broken in many places. But, if it floats (still haven't checked!) then I'll be good to go. 16' Carolina Perception. It is probably seven years old, based on my reckoning.

Nothing much to report on a misty morning on South Hill

after Shabbat

2011-10-01T19:28:00.006-07:00

I had planned not to post tonight, but felt inspired by the sunset:
Inspired by going to the farmer's market this afternoon also. I will still celebrate summer, despite its being so cold nowadays, so long as I can still buy raspberries, melons and basil! So, I bought some small heirloom tomatoes to boot and a package of fresh mozzarella... and did a Caprese salad for the first time in years. It had black pepper but it wasn't the fresh cracked kind. The sea salt from Yakushima hopefully made up the difference in taste. And combining this Italian delicacy with a pot of hot green tea with roasted rice, I was able to combine my favorite cuisines.

From the other night... it was a 6-pound (LOCAL & REAL) chicken (in brine for 24 hours) roasted with onions and garlic and carrots. I have to reconsider how I did the carrots... I suppose they would be better steamed next time, but the juice from the whole process is outstanding if I say so myself:

I also roasted some potatoes in olive oil and thyme so as to use the oven's energy for multiple uses.

The finished product, tasted better than pictures or words describe. Now I have chicken for days! Slightly problematic in that today I bought Coho salmon to cook for this week... but I will just have to work out a little more so that I can eat a little more!

I spent the morning at the Temple. I went to the Torah study and then participated in the Shabbat meditation service. It was nice. I don't know if I'll make it every week, but it was a nice reminder back into Judaism... American-style. It only took me an hour and 10 minutes to walk there. I think the total was 3.5 miles. It was nice to know that I can WALK across down and that it really doesn't take that long!

And to end this post, I will say that I did something naughty today. I will post a picture of it tomorrow. It's red, and I owe Mr. Mikula a shout-out (I already took him out to lunch) for saving it for me while I was busy this morning so that I could swoop in and buy it!

acceleration

2011-09-30T08:11:00.003-07:00

More intense dreams involving suffering. This time, I even warned the guy who fell and he looked back and then fell anyway. It seems that I can even tell folks that what they are about to do is not a good idea and then they do it regardless. It seems then it is my job to mitigate the pain and help relieve the suffering... well, it doesn't matter. These are only dreams, right?

Already feeling behind the eight-ball today. Got to sleep a little bit later than expected and struggled to get up. In large part because my muscles won't function! My arms, chest and back are so sore- especially my left tricep. Ouch. Gotta stretch it all out today and NOT work them until Sunday.

Got a ton of reading done yesterday. Backup- first, I went to services and that was a refreshing experience. The service was nice and this congregation is so sweet. Not too big, not too small (at least for High Holidays) and a good mix of folks. Though there seemed to be a lack of young people... I guess Bellingham doesn't host the biggest Jewish population around.

Got a ton of reading done yesterday. It was wonderful. Sitting outside and studying. I was able to comprehend much more because I was outside. The ironic part is that I was reading about how vitamin N (Nature) is important in our lives. It's Richard Louv's new book, The Nature Principle. Not gonna plug it, but he says what I feel (and instinctively know- actually we all know it and still don't do it): Get outside, it is therapeutic and healthy.

Straight up. Go outside right now. Leave this computer behind. We don't balance our technological uses with enough nature and that imbalance is unhealthy. Wanna get in shape? Go outside. Wanna perform better at work? Go outside. Wanna be a better person? Go outside. Want to live? Go outside.

Just sit or stand for a minute or five. It is good for you. Creative juices start to flow, energy comes back, motivation gets stronger. It's cold? Put on a jacket and a hat. It's hot? Take off your jacket. The sun is not the important factor, nor even the fresh air. If you are in a city, go outside. If you are in the country, go outside. Give your body what it needs.

Yup, I am feeling behind and the need to go on with things today. Gym, class, library, evening services... and you know what? I'll spend as much of the time in transit... outside. Outside. It's the next big drug. Prozac and Ritilin got nothin' on Nature. It's like Shel Silverstein's poem, "The Curse of Gimmesome Roy":

'Well, that is that,' says Baba Fats, sitting back down on his stone,
Facing another thousand years of talking to God alone.
'It seems, Lord,' says Fats, 'it's always the same, old men or bright-eyed youth,
It's always easier to sell them some shit than it is to give them the truth.'

You'll find me overdosing on nature while there is still some to go around. Accelerating into Shabbat. It will be nice to rest this week. No post tomorrow.

take it easy

2011-09-29T08:05:00.004-07:00

The Rabbi reminded me last night that there are strict laws/rules and that there is a flowing world. You can't have a world if you are too stuck on rules. I appreciate what she was getting at. I am pretty stuck on rules and formality... I think they are fun and good ideas. But if I get too strict with it all, it turns into irritation. And that is no fun at all. What is life and the world, if not fun?

She also discussed "being lost." There are lots of steps to getting found, but an important one is standing still. And waiting. And the right signals will clue us in. And then there was the falldowngetup, which is one word. You fall down and immediate get up. That's gonna happen too. I suppose that one will come later according to her timeline of events. But is important to bounce up. To keep going. To have fun. To open our hearts and develop compassion.

----

If I have done you wrong in the past year (or more) I sincerely apologize and ask for your forgiveness. I am a human being learning everyday to become more compassionate and it is an on-going struggle and lesson to learn. I am not perfect and never will be. But I will keep working at it.

----

At a relatively empty (in attendance) morning gym session, I did some pull-ups and push-ups yesterday and my body feels it big time. Pain in all the right muscles. Ouch.

----

Weird dreams last night. I watched as a horse emptied its carcass out of a hole in its skin and then convulse as it was dying. I was there to comfort some friends as they dealt with the traumatic experience. As for me, it was just another creature going the way of life and death, I wasn't too moved by the scene- more moved by my friends who were in shock after the event. They changed as a result and I woke up after offering to escort one home.

Another one, late morning (after the alarm of course) was about my second Toyota Camry. I had parked it in a place weeks before I left on vacation. It was behind a grocery store because it was lit, as opposed to my apartment complex from which I assumed it would get towed (which is counter-intuitive). After walking around for a bit in a parking lot, I remembered where it was and got with a friend to walk in the dark to get there. We almost got hit by a car on the way, but we were actually very far from it. I remember being irritated at the car lights that had seemed close- but when I turned around to see the car, it was far away and we were in no danger.

I guess that says something about me being jumpy or paranoid and my ability to get irritated easily with no necessary cause. This is a lesson I was reminded of last night at services and that I should take it easy, trust people a little more and not be so quick to respond or judge others. (And even the perfect humans can't be perfect all the time, so we may always be seeing perfect people in their momentary of lapse from perfection.) I woke up never having gotten to the car, but I knew that we were on the right track. And I feel that way as I type this out, eating some granola from well over a year ago and prepare to leave for Rosh Hashanah morning services.

Sunny again... L'shana Tova

2011-09-28T17:32:00.003-07:00

Happy New Year folks.

I write this a couple of hours before going to services. I didn't do the morning writing today, as I was hoping to get to the gym at a reasonable and early hour. The past two days I thought it was would be nice to refocus and calm down by shooting baskets at the gym. That is a favorite pastime. But it was packed. Simply a zoo. I can't go to the gym after noon because there are way too many folks there. I will be doing my activity in the morning and maybe having to adjust sleeping patterns in order to accommodate morning writing (and reading!)

I have been writing a lot about myself recently- both jovial times and tribulations (although the suffering is usually self-imposed as opposed to persecution.) This will continue, but I hope to also add some more creative bits too.

I just read that humans may be psychologically predisposed to living in open spaces and near water sources. This allows our basic needs to be met. We can have access to drinking supply and probably food. We can also affirm our security in that no predators may sneak up on us. The view from my patio/perch where I read this information is a nice red-brick area. There is a matching brown/red fence that surrounds the yard and generally protects me from vision of passers-by. I hear them laugh or drive or walk and then see them through slivers in slats along the fence, but they are undisturbed not knowing that I am there reading and briefly glancing at them. Of course my landlord can peer down and see me, but I never look up to check!

I sit in a plastic patio chair (you know the kind) as my laundry and kitchen towels dry behind me. It is late in the summer, indeed the beginning of autumn, so there is long light and it hangs at 50-degrees and stays pretty far to the south. I know that the angles will get even lower and the southern range of its pattern will only deepen. Meanwhile, my laundry dries and I absorb as much Vitamin D as is possible, while still staying warm under a fleece blanket. A cup (actually a pot) of fresh green tea with roasted rice (thank you Naoko-sensei) keeps my mind alert as I start to doze off in the late afternoon rays. I have a lot of reading to do so I can't sleep right now. My chair is not so comfortable, and according to my Yoga instructor (god-bless her!) most American chairs are not designed for our health. I am hyper vigilant to my back and making sure it is getting stronger. I sit up straight and become aware as I slouch into it or lean forward too much. In the end, I am happy sitting on this chair, basking in the September sun, reading about conversation psychology- despite it's currently dense disposition.

I am paying to be a student. I pay and professionals give me things to read. It's kind of silly, you know that I can't just pick up these works and read them on my own. But the discussions, the constant barrage of work, and the schedule is indeed important. I pay for this freedom of time and do my reading and convert all of these factors into yet another piece of paper. It's a funny thing to consider. In the end, however, it is the opportunity to read, to enjoy reading and to share my thoughts about the reading with others (or sit in the class and affirm/ change my beliefs as others discuss the topics because I am not quick enough to speak up).

The chicken I bought (6 pounds of local organic bird) is sitting in brine. I hope to bake it tomorrow with onions and carrots and potatoes... Enough writing for now. It's time to get ready for services, taking the bus and another chapter of good reading.

(Funny, reading this now, after I posted it... This is randombling at its finest. I never DID get to the point of my post. And I didn't connect like thoughts either. I missed some transition sentences and glue to make my ideas make sense. That is a GOOD realization- I have to slow down!)

early morning

2011-09-27T06:46:00.003-07:00

Tuesday is rough. Gotta catch up on reading for today's class. Yoga at 9 and then class at 10. Today is the first meeting of an evening class that I registered for. We'll see if I should even be in it...

This blog is helping me with my thoughts and expressions. Yesterday I articulately and comically expressed myself in class. I am happy with what I said and the conversation it spurred.

Prior to that, I received a call about how my attempt to excuse myself from classes on Thursday was an "inexcusable" absence. A little bit shocked, I spoke without anger but with eloquence something along the lines of "disappointed with the University's lack of recognition for cultural diversity..."

I felt bad unleashing my verbal venom on the woman who had tried to help me only an hour earlier. So, after class I went to her to apologize for my curtness towards her. However, she reassured me that I was indeed, in the right. We worked out the steps I need to take (there has to be a paperwork trail) to get the absence excused and I will be able to make up my 1-credit yoga class after all. She was very nice and helpful and I am glad that it all worked out.

It's not that REALLY care, but I don't want to have an "unsatisfactory" grade because I missed class. On a bigger scale, frankly, missing class for a Jewish holiday in this day and age in the United States should be recognized as excused. I guess that is a difference with what I am used to from my days at UCLA. There, the school shuts down as there are (at least, used to be) so many Jews in the establishment- teaching and taking classes. Here, I may be in the company of rather few...

Nick came over yesterday afternoon and jammed on my piano in between bouts of reading. We made dinner in the form of burritos and he disappeared into the night after 11 with his black coat and black bowler hat hiding a John Muir-esque facade of red beard and mountain man hair. Good conversation and it was nice to relax with a friend.

Anyways, blogging in the morning has cleared my head and let me tell a story so far. No "valued" outcome results from it, but peace of mind is worth the "price" of time "spent."

Food blog and a happy start to the week

2011-09-26T09:28:00.002-07:00

Now that I live on my own, it's pretty important for me to cook. And I love to do it. creativity, efficiency, tasty... my favorite adjectives all rolled into one. I think; what tastes good? what is going bad first? and how can I make it all work?

My landlord gave me a zucchini last week. I don't even like zucchini. fortunately I had garlic... this might be the first time I have eaten it, let alone make it for myself. Almost 30 and still growing up!

I purchased an incredible piece of steel in Japan... it looks like this:

That was the Rainbow Trout that I bought- gutted not filleted. It was much better to buy the whole fish and fillet it myself. I did it and only had one small bone in my mouth during the meal. That Toyokatsu knife really did the trick!

Sauteed in the same garlic pan as the zucchini (saved washing something else). Plus, the fish head, spine, bones and tails make great fertilizer for the compost. This experience was worth the "trouble" of cutting a real animal and using its parts effectively. And doing the math, for the same price as the Coho I ate two nights ago, I got twice as much fish to eat with this Rainbow Trout. Maybe it's a cheaper fish, but I didn't have to pay for "labor" of filleting the fish.

Tasted much better than pictures or words describe. Of course served with Thai Jasmine rice and a side salad of tomato, carrot and mixed greens.

And this morning's breakfast. Like the woman at the Farmer's Market told me, "This is a $3 melon. I don't even have to weigh it." Well, I took her word for it, but she was wrong. I would have sold it for $10 knowing how good this thing was. Juicy, but not overly. Sweet, but not bowl-you-over. Delicate but fleshy enough to fill me up. Perfect. Really. Half for now and half for an after-school snack!

Yesterday I wrote my paper. Now I'll spend a couple of days editing it and then I can turn in the whole thing. I think it will be the longest paper that I have ever written! Go figure. It took all day and I was pretty drained by mid-afternoon.

After prepping for dinner, I hiked up to school with a lot of heavy Falcon and Eagle-related books in my backpack (it wasn't raining, so I decided to go for it.) I turned them in after holding onto them for nearly six months. Then I went to the gym. Just to shoot around again... and then found myself in the middle of a four-on-four full-court game. My team lost 11-8, but I definitely scored 6 of those points. It is a good feeling to know that I am a smart basketball player and in the right places to get rebounds. I was playing with more fit, younger undergraduate students and able to hold my own. I wasn't as quick, but I played angles and a little bit smarter. I got two steals and even a block to keep my team in it for another possession. Then 3-on-3 in the half court. Again, my team lost. But the guy I was guarding (a good 6 inches taller than me) only got two points. I scored two also- so that was a draw. Another block in there for me too.

My apartment is clean. It's almost ready for me to mess it up again with my myriad of projects. But I am confident that it is good for Rosh Hashanah on Thursday. I hope to go to services at the reform congregation here and I am still working on getting an excused absence for my 1-credit Yoga class which is based solely on participation! More importantly... Happy New Year to those who are celebrating... may it be joyous and sweet.

Another busy week of school starts today, but I hope to get reading to stay on course. And I still hope to catch up on three overdue blog posts and various other errands. I love my life. I love this program. I love this blog. Love.

Day three in a row

2011-09-25T08:01:00.004-07:00

Yesterday was not as productive as I would have like regarding my overdue paper. I broke the ice though and that was good enough. I will grill it out today and to the editing over the next couple of days.

Yesterday was great though toward the end of the day. Well, first, the Farmer's Market was great- met lots of farmers (you can tell by looking at their hands) and bought good stuff. Some sun melons which I've never eaten before as well as an oriental cucumber. I also bought a whole chicken and while the prices for all of this stuff and the other stuff I bought was a bit high I am pretty sure that the quality is also high and my health will also be elevated. Well worth the price and still cheaper than Japan, so I am in a good place with food.

Yesterday I was in a funk so I rushed off to the gym in the evening before it closed. It is sooo nice to shoot around on a nice indoor basketball court. I yearn for the fresh air of my outdoor Diablo court, but this was sticky floors and fast-paced basketball. Even my shots were faster. Promptly after shooting the lights out, I met some Japanese foreign exchange students and introduced myself in Japanese. We played for about 20 minutes together before the gym was shut down. It was a lot of fun and NOT competitive. Like Vinnie said once, it's nice to play in Japan because no one cares about winning more than actually playing. I got to experience that again and it was great. I even woke up with a dream about walking away from competition, so I know that this feeling is resonating in me somehow.

Yesterday I spoke to my parents. They sound good and it was nice to touch base with them. As usual we are plotting and dreaming of the future, while talking about our past events. New vacations are in the works and old vacations have been shared too. That was calming.

Yesterday I ate well. Lots of green, continued. Some instant stuffing (not so healthy) was easy and I am eating up remnants from the summer. I came back here with a lot of backpacking meals and I will be going through them slowly too, not only eating the healthiest local organic stuff I buy. A small piece of Coho pan-fried-steamed in teriyaki/soy sauce with a small salad of mixed chards and a tomato with the last of my sesame dressing. I found the perfect dressing container while walking to school the other day- being given away in a "free" box. So I hope to get some recipes to make my own dressing. In the meantime I can revert to the balsamic vinegar and olive oil goodness that has sustained me in other places.

Yesterday is over. Today has begun. Got enough sleep, though I woke up dehydrated. I look to the stuffing for the salt-overdose and my water deficiency upon opening my eyes. It is windy and the laundry I put out to dry yesterday afternoon is seemingly dry. There has been no heat nor sun, but the wind must have done some good work through the night. I like that I can continue to NOT use a dryer, it is a waste of electricity so long as I have the ability to air dry my clothes. Plus they will last longer and soak up vital earth energy, as opposed to electric charges. Now if only I had an iron... or knew how to use it.

I have to write my paper today and it is going to be a toil. But I can sprinkle good small meals in between writing bouts. and there is still the gym where I can spend a couple of hours (including the 45-min round-trip walk) getting my body some needed energy release. And the stretch I was doing has fallen short. Perhaps I can spend a bit of time with that today and get back on track by including that into the routine. Come to think of it, I am excited for this paper today. It marks the end of my summer and the culmination of lots of work.

UCLA won. USC lost. And the best part is that I didn't spend more than 15 minutes watching any football. And I really don't care that much. And as I wrote before (or told some people) I am having a hard time watching American football. It is so slow and not really that exciting. Basketball and especially soccer and rugby are moving all the time and reflect proper ebbs and flows in human energy flow.

Last thought is a small one about American politics. Obama will win the next election. Why? Republicans are sending in nutjobs. Even the nutjobs know better than to vote for them. The psychos will, but they are a tiny minority. The Republican Party is not dumb. They want Obama to win so that he can continue to try to clean up the mess that they made. He will get close and then his second term will be over and at that time the shining new Republican leader (who will appear to be normal) will save the day! This is because they will be working with a majority Republican Congress- just you watch. Obama's work will be handed over to this new guy (and it isn't going to be a woman, considering historical precedence) and then he will go about fucking it all up again. So, the economy will be shite for another three years and then we will all get jobs when the Republicans come in to rescue us from the despotic hands of "Big Government" (which actually seems smaller than when Bush was leading us to war... HA. Just expect another small war/conflict as soon as Obama gets us out of Afghanistan. There. Documented.

And with that, I will go to my breakfast and disconnect from the internet to write my paper! Eagles and Falcons (no, not football), though last week we saw the Falcons out-gun the Eagles. In fact, last week was part of my final project... just kidding. Enough "randombling." Yes, I just coined that word!

After the Equinox and a rant

2011-09-24T09:04:00.005-07:00

A day of rest- happy Saturday. Got to sleep late. It's good because I was out till 12:30 last night, driving home drunk friends. It was nice to go out on the town, to see Bellingham get a little bit crazy in the evening. Downtown is a boppin' scene, or at least it was last night because the weather was fine. Flip flops for me too- that is how nice it was. It was really nice to have dinner with Barbara and Jyoti last night too. We had chili and some nice discussion before I left early and met with some colleagues and friends.

A bit weirded out by my landlord telling me how to live. He has to come down here every once in a while and he was quick to see a fan on and the heat on (set at 65). He is right in saying that I don't need those things on while I am gone. But the heat didn't even kick on for two days until after it was set. And he ought not tell me that the fan only needs to be on for 15 minutes. I can tell it needs to be on longer. The gist is that it was just weird coming home to a note on my desk last night. This is not that big of a deal, but I wrote it out anyway because it was streaming through my head.

I will sit and write a long overdue paper this gorgeous sunny weekend. That is OK. It's time I did it. Other folks are going to the Institute for an anniversary picnic.

Here is my opportunity to rail against that place. These are my feelings and they are not wrong or right. But they should be set free. I worked hard for a year and never got a thank you. Not a little note. I don't expect it, but I guess I thought it would be nice. You pay $15,000 to work and basically give another $15,000 free labor (more?) to a place, you think they'd have the class and tact to write a thank you note. I suppose I will earn a "certificate" in March, but small details are very important. A good lesson for me to have learned- small thank you's matter.

The last piece is that I feel slighted. I worked pretty hard but did one thing that I probably shouldn't have done. That one thing did no harm to anyone, but I "bragged" about it to others. It was blown out of proportion by two people I trusted. They were quick to turn on me and "tell on me" and after that the attitude of other folks changed. I am disgusted that after all that time, they didn't even talk to me first. That shows me that they saw me as a free laborer instead of a person. With the change of the administration's attitude toward me soon thereafter, without remembering the good work I had done, I feel like my work was for naught. Fortunately, the Institute can continue its system of free labor under the guise of education while they milk the federal government for money unknowingly too. There, I said it. It's true. They wonder why the poorer conservative community hates their existence. It is a beacon of flourishing and money, like a nature hotel, while tourists drive by their rural poverty and drug-stricken communities.

I sound bitter. I guess you get stepped on enough, you are bound to say something. And while the Institute's celebration of 25 years begins in a couple of hours, it would be wiser to reflect and see that their growing business is losing track of the familiarity that made it strong in the first place. Money rules, even in the non-profit sector, and mission comes second. It's a funny lesson to learn and another reminder that if I am going to work hard when money is involved it should be for big bucks. I shouldn't try to nickel and dime others in the sake of "good will."

Wow, this blog went wild. I guess those thoughts had to be expressed after all. I feel better after having written it out. I am glad I had the experience of a year up there, and so perhaps I should have written nothing at all. But I woke up and this all continued to weigh on me. Instead of letting it sit, I decided to write. I want to write some positive vibes to start the day- after all it is gorgeous and should be nice at the farmer's market. But I don't look at this as negative. More just an opportunity to get out feelings. on to breakfast.

Ok, I'll try this

2011-09-23T09:10:00.009-07:00

So, an article that Wayne sent me said to write everyday. Even a paragraph. That way I can learn to write like I speak. And someone the other day told me that I tell decent stories. I always think that people lose interest in my stories. I guess it's because I remember the details, get sidetracked and try to add a lot of background. In this day and age, folks want it fast and if they are into taking their time, they will read! So, I should practice writing like I speak and those who have the patience and gumption to read, will do it. Perhaps they will read not just this blog, but other stories too if I can get around to writing them. The other piece of advice was to write in public (like this blog) just like I would speak in public. OK. Let's try it.

Clint and Alex stayed here for two nights. They found a place to live, so they packed up and headed out this morning. It was nice having visitors even though my place is a mess and I am still working out the kinks of living here. My view is tremendous and very inspirational.

My classes are going to be a lot of work. I have been to three classes (Beginning yoga!, Conservation Psychology and Foundations of Environmental Education.) Today is Language and Discourse (with respect to the environment of course) and I expect to settle into that one also as the professor is taking a more historical approach I think. There is a LOT of writing and reading for me to do. And with abundant tea and incense, I suspect that my humble abode will turn into a sanctuary of learning and peace. That is what I would like.

I'm still interested in finding a sea kayak. I am still interested in training. I am still interested in compiling years worth of notes into some stories from traveling. After all, the individual experiences were nice, but it means a lot more if I can share them. Then I can truly come to grips with the lessons and context of my life. And then, I can throw out my notes finally, after having schlepped them across the Pacific and back already... twice (both south [Chile] and west [Japan] from the West coast)

And let's add a relatively recent picture too! This is White Mountain-Heather (Cassiope mertensiana) atop Trapper's Peak (5966 feet) with Mt. Triumph (7240 feet) looming in the background. Kate and I summitted in August.

change of diet

2011-09-22T15:31:00.002-07:00

Moved into my new place. (Still have to write about the summer and Japan). Thus, very backlogged, I am going to keep up with the present and keep chipping away at the past (including a paper that was due 6 weeks ago... ahhh!). Today I ate a ton of veggies and fruits. Salad of fresh greens from a local garden of a neighbor, stuff from a local farm. Chard, Lettuce, carrots, beets, spinach. Pluots (yellow and purple- they were so good) which are a mix between a plum and heaven! Actually I have no idea. Donut peaches were last week and I also had a pear. I am going to swipe a couple of apples from another neighbor's tree... they are letting them all fall to the ground, so I am just trying to prevent the waste. Tomatoes (in the salads) and potatoes (french fries with some Yakushima salt!) and blackberries in the form of a cobbler! Onions in the eggs this morning- which I will implore a neighbor with 30 chickens in his yard to see if he has extras.

Lots of veggies and fruits. I need some more carbs... and well, the meat I am working on eating less. I'm aiming to cook only birds and fish, leaving the four-legged ones alone. That is not to say I will stop eating flesh from those creatures. I just won't cook it for myself or order it at restaurants (but shredded beef tacos are so good--- of course, there are exceptions!) More fresh goodness in my life... we'll see if this can keep up through the winter or how much it will change. Local and fresh produce and fruits will take center stage with smaller portions of meat. And load the carbs too- it's gonna be a cold winter!

abroad

2011-09-12T02:08:00.004-07:00

It's important that I keep writing. I have like three blogs in my head and no time to put them down. Nor to download the pictures. The first one will be about teaching teens about climate science in the backcountry all summer. The next one will be about transitioning to Bellingham (city of 80,000) from Diablo (hamlet of 50?)... from the mountains back to the sea. And the next will be about a visit to Japan. Of course, I can't upload these pictures right now,but I want to get this out so that I at least know that I haven't gone too much more than TWO MONTHS without blogging. Oy.

SUMMA TIME!

2011-07-07T12:30:00.011-07:00

Happy July. Wow, it came up quick.

Grilled out some training through June. Rocked a presentation on the Peregrine Falcon and Bald Eagle. Did some hiking and some decompressing. Begun the “mourning” process of my residency- it finishes at the end of August. From tomorrow until the end I am working most days, with one or two off here and there. I have had a nice rest (my break was before the work, whereas others have longer breaks in between trips.)

Went to Southern California for four days. My brother flew in from San Francisco also. We spent time with Dad, who had back surgery, and Mom- eating well, walking a little bit and enjoying the sunlight! July 4th was a blast--- back to the neighborhood for some familiar faces. Hung out with Grandma Lily on that afternoon and we went to In-n-out together. Then some other old skool faces over the couple of days- friends from high school and AZA. A quick jaunt to SD to see my dad’s parents and generally enjoy the sunshine. Thank God for the sun… wow it is an amazing feeling to bake and bask in the light. I really missed it!

Cheers!

yet another overdue post

2011-06-22T12:35:00.004-07:00

I don’t remember the last time I wrote (common way for me to start a blog post!)

It was a long time ago… when the things were blooming and I was sneezing much more. Now it is very green and the sun is actually shining today.

Working backwards: yesterday was the solstice and we BBQ’d to celebrate. On the fly I called everyone I could and invited them to share some outdoor time in Diablo. Good times. Then an evening paddle on Diablo Lake with Kate and Teresa… I was so good sitting in the princess seat… dead weight and conversation-making…

Finished two books, “The Naturalist,” Edward O. Wilson’s autobiography and Robert Murphy’s “The Peregrine Falcon.” Reading two books simultaneously was a bit of a challenge, but overall it was nice to go back and forth so as to stay fresh. When my eyes might start to close during Wilson’s theoretical analysis of island biogeography (interesting, but dense), I could turn to Murphy’s hypothetical situation of a female falcon’s tribulations and life-cycle during her first migration from the Barrens (arctic) to the Florida Keys.

I have had some time prepping and training for the Cascade Climate Challenge program that will be keeping me busy this summer. Short: we get 20 teens, get them canoeing and backpacking in and around Ross Lake (North Cascades National Park Complex), do service work, do some teaching and facilitate lessons with Park staff. The topics revolve around the background of climate science and the research being done to understand current species adaptations and struggles with changing climate patterns. This helps us “get” to the meat of the “Climate Change” or “Global Warming” debate… what does it mean and how can we tell?

Cousin Athena got married to Sudip two weekends ago!!! It was a great ceremony… they mixed Indian and Jewish customs nicely along with a little bit of American culture too. It was rough to go to New Jersey only for two days, but seeing family was great and spending time with folks was a treat… O-hisashi-buri, deshou!

Here are some pictures of that wonderful occasion.

Male cousins... first time in a long time... my brother is not pictured.

Centerpiece of one of the tables: Midsummer Night's Dream

The ceremony... fun mix of Jewish and Indian traditions
Athena reads vows to Sudip after he spoke to her. Fabulous!

Final note on the peregrine falcons I was watching. Seven weeks after I started following them, we came to realize that this year’s eggs failed… and the parents took off. For over a week, the three eggs were sitting on the ledge… in the eyrie on a small “scrape,” the indentation of sub-straight dug by the falcon to contain the eggs and to prevent them from slipping off the ledge and down the cliff. Nothing. Nature is brutal. After migrating 1000’s of miles, mating, laying eggs, incubating… nothing. Was it too cold or too wet this year? What factors caused them to fail?
Leave, go eat, fly somewhere else, come back again next year and try again. I’ll write it again. Nature is brutal. Not the cuddly, fun stuff that we wish to see on all of our TV shows. But rather, REAL and not always successful. May it serve as a lesson for me. You can do everything right and factors beyond my control can influence the outcome. Just goes to show… And with that realistic and seemingly fatalistic approach that I now have, I also recognize the importance of every second. If we are fortunate enough to hatch, then we had better use every moment of breath to focus on living fully. Some eggs get infinitely close but don’t even hatch.

I'm Famous!!! --- Forest Service Award

2011-05-20T15:53:00.001-07:00

I just won an award... let me toot my own horn!

http://news.wwu.edu/go/doc/1538/1090987/WWU-Graduate-Students-Honored-With-United-States-Forest-Service-Award

Sweet!

ramblings

2011-05-16T17:34:00.001-07:00

I haven’t written on this blog in a long time. I went to California to see my family. Ran into Wayne and Drew too. Awesome five days in SoCal included some beach time, hiking in the blooming chaparral of the coastal desert.

Since then I have continued to be busy. Graduate school is ridiculous. Work your ass off. Make no money but actually PAY to do all the work and to be stressed out. But have the opportunity to do amazing things… of course this is a problem when there are way too many awesome things to do…

So, I have been doing a lot of doing. Thinking steps ahead, planning and plotting and working out logistics… and then I forgot about the present moment. It came to me one day when I was three steps ahead of myself walking and I realized I wasn’t even enjoying the walk. I was outside in nice weather (not common here, for reals!) but inside my house in my head and even at work the next day in my thoughts. It was then that I stopped and had to stop everything to catch back up with myself… or rather to reel myself in from the non-existent future that kept me oppressed from staying focused… and from actually learning from and enjoying the work that I was slated to do (and had been doing.)

I will never accomplish the gamut of tasks and ideas I have. But I should focus on doing my best at each one that is presented to me. And in zeroing in on quantity, I haven’t felt fully invested in the quality. And that is unacceptable. So it has changed.

There are still articles that I long to write (and will), but I am in the finishing process of the coyote I am trying to tan. My needle broke, so I can’t sew up two major holes in the hide, but they aren’t that big a deal. I am an amateur taxidermist, not a pro. The whole point is to show kids the pelts, not to sell high quality animal-fur merchandise.

Ski2Sea is in exactly two weeks. I have to train for the downhill skier leg. This means that I have to boot pack uphill for a long time and then strap on the snowboard for a run downhill. It isn't the snowboarding that is hard or time-consuming… but the hike up carrying my ride. So, I am training by hiking straight up Sourdough Mountain trail (5000 feet over 5 miles) for 30~40 minutes and then hiking down, all the while carrying my board. I may be in decent shape by the time the race comes around, but the elevation will be much different. I am at 1000 feet now and will be hiking at closer to 9000. I just plan to try hard and be consistent, even if I am a bit slow.

Two weekends ago, I helped with an institute course, studying reptiles and amphibians on the east side. It was drier and gorgeous, albeit cold. I got to hold some snakes including a northern pacific rattlesnake… it was awesome to go to a real rattlesnake den! It was amazing to hang out among a bunch of snakes and realize that they are docile creatures… that is after the initial rattling and striking of course!

Last weekend I met and heard Richard Louv speak in Bellingham. He is author of Last Child in the Woods and the recent one: The Nature Principle (which he of course signed for me after I bought it…) He may be one of the reasons why folks are actually supporting the work my colleagues and I are doing. Kids of all ages (elementary, teens, high schoolers, ADULTS!) need more nature in their lives… I can go on and on about this. Get outside. Period.

Lakers lost to the Mavericks a couple weeks ago. That put me in a downer mood. It was an ungraceful loss…oh well, time to rebuild. Thank you, Phil.

Writing this out is great. Oh, lastly… I have been following a pair of peregrine falcons over the past month. From the flirting, preparing to mate, copulating, and nesting. Every day or every couple of days, I get the spotting scope focused onto a precarious ledge over a hundred foot drop into the chasm of Diablo gorge… at the base of the dam. And there, nestles, sits one of the peregrines on three (maybe four?) eggs, keeping them warm until they hatch- I have calculated that this will be between May 31~June 4. And then there may be some more falcons on which I can spy! I have seen them fly, sit, copulate, live… I hope to see them feed sometime; perhaps even perform the mid-air transfer of prey I have heard about. Nature is amazing. And I am really transforming into a Birder (nerder!) by focusing on the sounds from and visuals of all of the spring visitors and residents of the Diablo Lake watershed and western North Cascades Mountains.

I want to write more, but I also want to read more… there are three current books, but the one I like the most is E.O. Wilson’s, The Naturalist. I have a bunch of pictures that will hopefully add to your understanding of my writings… there are three more blog postings (5 pix each)... ciao!

Snakes in the Methow!

2011-05-16T17:26:00.003-07:00

Holding a gopher snake that an instructor grabbed from a hole

Close-up on the gopher snake an hour later... it was catching some rays.... check out the tongue!

Holding a Racer... they sometimes den with garter snakes and rattlers in dens (on the sides of STEEP hillsides) to maintain heat during cold winter months. This one was sunning itself next to the den we visited and it smelled funny after it peed in defense.

Northern Pacific Rattlesnake tail reverberating in my hand! What an awesome experience and a unique feeling and sound. This rattler was 4 feet long and rather timid/ friendly once we got it into the tube. The instructors coerced it into a plastic tube that would ensure we wouldn't get bit.

Said rattlesnake in the tube! I have other pictures, but this one says it pretty good...

Signs of spring in the Pacific Northwest

2011-05-16T17:20:00.003-07:00

Sakura (cherry blossoms) blooming near SeaTac airport!

Western Trillium in Carnation, WA

Eggs from a ground-nesting Killdeer (bird)! I was walking along and these were chilling on the ground near a pond we meant to explore for amphibians... I immediately turned my attention to birding, however, and these eggs were a great find... perhaps a good meal for a gopher snake that we had held 10 minutes earlier!

Picture of the Cascades from the east side (Methow valley)... gorgeous Ponderosa pine forest mirroring the spring of the eastern Sierra I'm sure.

Spring pictures... April in California

2011-05-16T17:07:00.006-07:00

Colonial Peak (7771 feet) on the first sunny day of (almost) spring... in April. I think it was the 7th.

Wayne was surprised by my taking a picture of him in the AM before we went to soccer. It is not the most flattering picture of such a good-looking friend, but I have to get at him somehow :P

My parents' garden in bloom on April 16th. California Golden Poppies, persimmon, lavender, and manzanita.

Other succulents and cacti in the process of being beautiful!

Dad and me in front of the Bommer Canyon water tower that I organized to be repainted 14 years ago! It is still in great shape- a testament to quality hard work. Also the new landmark sign of the brand-spankin' newly opened Bommer Canyon trailhead! It was nice to walk among the grasses and Redwing Blackbirds... and California Quails and various rabbits!

Calm in the Madness

2011-04-25T18:29:00.003-07:00

So busy still... but so excited about it all.

Since April 2nd, my last post, I turned in the project and we had the interview. I wish I wasn't so awkward in person sometimes, as the written portion was better than the spoken evaluation. I used to be good in person I swear...

Nevermind though. I have been enjoying weeks of great students. Some challenging. Others focused... all of them, however, changed my life and helped me realize that I am in the right career. All of the feedback points into the direction of my continuing this line of work. The topic is important to me so any thing that I can teach helps my follow the vision and mission for my life- protecting the environment. That is the large picture. Like Martin Luther King said, "Keep your eyes on the prize." If I keep this objective in mind, then I can continue on... every second is vital. Every moment anything I can do can change the whole world... it is an inspiring feeling.

After such a horrible Feb~March, this manic difference is a super high feeling. I really like this and feel like this is almost natural... I have felt this way, naturally for over a month. Which means I am in the right place.

Anyways... I was in California for five days. Spent time with the family- parents and grandparents. Spent time with two of my best friends- Wayne and Drew. Spent time in my favorite places- beach and coastal chaparral trails, seeing birds and the ocean... in the SUN! Recharged even more with all of those rays... ahh.

Led some guided walks last weekend in the gorgeous sun in Padilla Bay, WA. Saw tons of birds there and at the learning center too: Golden Eagle, Bald Eagle, Red-tail hawk, great blue heron, spotted towhee, peregrine falcon, yellow-rumped warbler, northern flicker, plus the usual suspects in Canada geese, ruffled grouse, dark-eyed junco, American robin, varied thrush, Stellar's jay, ravens....

I am in the process of a relationship with a pair of Falcons. Today, when I was searching for the eyre (nest), the male screamed at me as soon as I got out of my car. Looking through my binoculars I saw the the most intense eyes I've seen in a wild creature. It may not have been yelling in a mean way, but it's communication is strong. Maybe it knows that I am peering towards the nest, maybe I am making up a story about my feelings about this bird. It was a moment of sincere and scary interaction. Honestly, that small bird has more energy than I do and I am feeling pretty good.

Last Monday we had a nice seder in Irvine with the family. Last night I hosted a seder in Diablo. It was a great night and I enjoyed it, as did most folks. Passover, or Pesach, is the Jewish Thanksgiving... and it is like my favorite day of the year. I am so happy that dinner was edible... though I got some pretty nice feedback about it!

I have seen a Bobcat (or a Lynx?), am skinning a coyote (to add to the collection) and feel like a part of nature. There is still a lot of time I can spend outside that I am not, but I am trying to get as much fresh air, observation time and exposure to the hundreds of species (plants, birds, animals, insects) that come out in the spring as I type this...

Ahh... playoff basketball too. Good Luck Lakers... you can do it!

busy = best

2011-04-02T14:40:00.002-07:00

at least for me... (very little or) no sleep, as I anticipated. A finished project. a 70-page non-profit organization... and a sweet-looking business plan. An amazingly rewarding teaching experience. Great camaraderie with my partners in crime. A cancelled event that may in fact may be a blessing in disguise. I will sleep very well tonight after watching some basketball. I have time to just fuck off and consider my own needs and that feeling is liberating. Crazy weather... lots of rain, an inch of snow yesterday and more rain to come. I can take a 2-hr class online, get my taxes done hopefully write an article for an environmental ed journal and tie up loose ends as the spring comes flooding in... and I can get into the "moment" once again! And a step closer to freedom.

Mustache March

2011-03-27T17:42:00.001-07:00

This was taken during 72 hours of sillyness....

stress into overdrive

2011-03-27T09:26:00.003-07:00

Well, the latter half of last week was great. Wonderful to teach students again, they were such awesome people- we hiked, observed, and enjoyed nature... Discovered indoor soccer capabilities along with basketball in the indoor gym. Saw Athena, Sudip, Barbara and Jyoti in Bellingham. Good conversation, wedding discussions and delicious food. Got my own copy of The Lorax and Oh the Places You'll Go. Yeah for Dr. Seuss. Lunched with Nicole in Mt. Vernon. Thai food is wonderful on a Saturday afternoon. Got more info about taxidermy and how to handle the otter and raccoon. I'll be back to those pelts in no time. Shopping for food... fresh produce now at my home! Enjoyed my first coffee in over a month... I stopped drinking it when the headaches settled in. NO MORE HEADACHES! It was just over three weeks of having them. And I am exactly a week from having one (though I still have medicine handy just in case.) No more drinking alcohol. I will have to get used to "not being fun" or "being a tight-ass" but no more poison for me... it's just not worth the repercussions. Helped John move into his house for three hours yesterday- I earned my dinner and my sleep, that is for sure. And tomorrow my body will ache, I'm sure. And for the next week it is non-stop teaching (everyday), working on non-profit project (due Friday) and finishing the alumni reunion event that takes place on Saturday and Sunday. The non-profit project has been in the works for over four months now, though a month of that was during winter vacation... our group is almost there, but we have a lot of cleaning up to do yet. I am working with Codi on all of these projects too. She and I have a fun dynamic (worked together on the curriculum project also) but it's about to get stressful--that's for sure. Hopefully she and Jimmy had a chance to spend time together over the weekend so that she is also fired up and recharged for this week of insanity. Then it's teaching... but a more normal life... from April 4th. Lots of weekend getaways, jobs and small things to do... but more manageable, and with extended daylight hours I foresee more enjoyment and energy in my life in the upcoming months. In the meantime, I have to stay focused for an entire week... starting NOW!

good day

2011-03-23T19:22:00.003-07:00

... i didn't have to use my AK....

Today was the first day of mountain school and I am happy with how it went. Great kids, patience, lots of teachable moments, lots of energy directed in the right way and sunny, wonderful weather. A brisk, frosty morning that inspired me to walk to the learning center. observing a TON of birds and then again with other instructors as we waited for the students to arrive. I feel pretty good right now.

I am on the latter half of the process with the raccoon and await some oil to finish the pelt. the otter still puzzles me... how on earth am i going to finish fleshing it, how long will it take and it the skin going bad? I swear there was something funky about it... and I'd feel bad if I waste the pelt. I just don't know if I should keep going. I suppose when the raccoon is done, I will be able to focus on the otter once and for all... and then give it my all until I finish or determine that it is FUBAR. I salted it again today after soaking it a couple of times... I wonder if doing this is really bad... I have a feeling it is, but I'll just have to wait until I have the time to devote to doing it right.

I feel pretty good right now. still recovering from my march-seasonal upsetness... but being outside a lot seems to be a good method of helping me cope. And the students are gems this week too...

And I watched the Lakers last night.... first time in a very long time... and to win against the Suns in Triple OT... that wasn't what I expected. Shoulda ended the game earlier, but it was fun to watch.

My thoughts go out to those who are suffering in Japan... may you soon be comforted.

downs and ups

2011-03-19T12:29:00.002-07:00

I have been having ups and downs-- mostly downs... The headaches, the time change, the madness in Japan. All of this is affecting me. I haven't been exercising and I have been feeling lethargic. Feeling nauseous, no appetite. Insomnia and sleep troubles.

All of this is a recipe for depression and disaster. It is amazing how fast it all came cycling at me. And to get myself out of this is hard. But the most important part is to recognize it. Once it is seen, it can be dealt with... otherwise it is slow madness that eats away at me and no one knows.

Why do I write such private matters on a public forum? I heard a quote to explain it:

"Those who mind, don't matter. And those who matter, don't mind."

This blog is a way for my to be honest with myself and the world. I don't have to put it in people's faces... they choose to come to this site or come across it on their own behalf.

I have struggled a lot the past week. I was in a shell and unable or unwilling to come out of it. I plan to find a doctor or counselor with whom I can talk, as that is one more way that I can help myself. In the meantime, I will force myself to work on the things I have been putting off- both the obligations I'd rather not do and the projects that mean something to me.

If I have wasted my time during the day, then I won't sleep so well. So I had better start working and putting my all into my work, and my relationships with other people. Dedication and commitment to others and to my self... the sleep may come after that and the cycle will slowly go on the up.

And, I gotta remember not to take myself too seriously.... and to remember to laugh too.

I fucking hate February~ March. I turn into Davey Downer. But to be fair, I didn't snowboard this winter very much, nor did I take a vacation to a warm or exotic place. This is the first time in eleven years that I didn't go on such a vacation. Note to self... go on vacation properly next winter! And get a job that will let you take a week or six off to play during the winter!

Regardless of my ramblings, I have almost made it... and that is something I can hinge my motivation on. Spring equinox is soon and the moon's pull will slowly diminish in its strength as it backs away from Earth.... and that will help me, I'm sure.

Sweet. Back to work... and one day I hope this raccoon (and the otter- which may be lost...) will be fleshed completely.

-DS-

WILD Dreams and Happy Spring- but don't read all of this!

2011-03-08T08:55:00.006-08:00

The American Robin has made an appearance at my house and the learning center. As far as I am concerned, spring is here. I have shaved off my beard and am keeping the mustache for March. (only two days so far, but maybe it will come off today!) I wore a Hawaiian shirt today to emphasize the Magnum PI inclination I have.

The moon is new. I have been speaking with and listening to many of my colleagues. Emotions have been running high in all of our heads for different reasons. All of us have challenges.

My cluster headaches came back two weeks ago and they have knocked me out for a while. I had one yesterday but some medication helped me through it. Mom brought that up on her visit last weekend.

Mom came up last weekend and we enjoyed three days together in the Cascades. Lots of talking, eating, tea-ing, and some hiking and snowshoeing to boot. It was nice to have her stay with me and to introduce her to my life (and all of the people) up here.

I haven't worked out in three weeks and feel weak. I have no appetite and wake up nauseous often.

The workload is daunting. I have a ton of things to do in a particular order and no motivation to do them. The headaches, food consumption, emotional attachment and jealousy, lack of physical...

All leads in a downward cycle to down. Down and down it goes. Down and down I go.

Reminds me of a dream from last night. I just finished a book which took me four years to read. Jung's Man and his Symbols. It is a hard read- a psychoanalysis book of sorts. Though lots of it went through my eyes at late night hours and was promptly forgotten, some it stuck with me. And those vivid guides help me consider the events from last night.

I was nervous writing down anything. It seems weird and I thought I could sleep off any dreams. Wrong. I refused to acknowledge the unconscious and it came back with lucid visuals.

Please stop reading. But I can't stop writing.

The dream I have involves a group of us hanging out and having a good time. I was jealous of a good-looking guy who was with a woman I wanted to be with but I was making the most of the event. Eventually we wanted to slide down a steep muddy hill in the rain. This guy went for it first and we all cheered him on. He picked up a lot of speed, but didn't stop as expected. He went under a picnic table and slid underneath it before stopping on the other side of a small burm. He stood up with his hands held high and yelled. Then, he looked down as I realized that his neck was marked with three horizontal crimson stripes. He looked down in horror and pulled out some cables out of his neck. I had noticed those thin wire supports under the picnic table and feared for the worse. Then, he collapsed.

I yelled at some friends to call for help, it was instinctual. We got around him, ready to help medically. I started to get flustered because everyone was helping and we weren't safeguarding his needs. I looked into the face of a friend who was seemingly out of place and then into the face of the dying man. I knew then that my efforts were in vain because the outcome was sealed. The dream faded off with folks determining how to start CPR and the clearness to me that it was best to step away.

I haven't ever been a witness to a death. So, to see one in my dream was unforgetable. I thought about my role as the observer and helper. I tried to look at the dream from a me-centered perspective. But, after reading that book and writing this out, I have another viewpoint. It coincides perfectly with the newness of this time and space in my life. I tried to help the man and relieve his pain. But it was his time to die. It is time for "me" to die. For my ego to let go of me. That was not me helping another man; it was my watching my ego die.

I have been caught up in a difficult mental capacity. It is the same one that I have had for years, but upon arriving back to the US I jumped right into things. I adjusted to living here functionally, as I have done with other countries. Then I built up an ego based on a defensive stance, to hold onto the history and past that I have understood, to keep me grounded. I have held onto an ego that helped me stay rooted.

But that same ego has kept me and from moving on. And, with the fresh outlook on life that all of these signs are forcing me to recognize, I can't help but go with the flow of it all. My ego has been struggling to stay in the limelight and I have been afraid of going on without it. I have become way too serious for my own good. And I watched it die.

I don't mean to say that I don't have an ego. It is still there and will always be there. In fact, my life would be empty without it. But the extent to which I have been holding it in place will be changing. I can't allow my inner workings to wind themselves up as they had for months. I have to let it all flow. That is the second mention of it... flow like Stetattle Creek behind my house, flow like the mighty Skagit... water moves onward and fighting the current only creates rapids on one's own being.

I have to go watch some presentations of the students who will graduate next week. But I wanted to get this out of my head. You should have stopped reading a long time ago. But I can't stop writing. And that is another story... throwing out the notes of the past and stepping into the present. I may be burning years of notes in my fireplace as a way to get to the essence of it all again. Cathartic indeed... not closure but the important debrief process in life that I must do.

Cheers

wow, it has been a long time

2011-02-14T09:13:00.005-08:00

I was thinking that I had posted recently, but that assumption is clearly false.

Anyhow, today I will hopefully finish the otter pelt. it is thawed and ready to get scraped... and I have the materials to clean and preserve the hide too. wish me luck!

Recent things, three-day naturalist retreat with the cohort- one day of snow science, snowshoe testing and avalanche training. Another day of birding on the Skagit flats... which was awesome! The highlight involves a flock of Snow Geese (Anser caerulescens) moving and flying directly overhead... it was like a swarm of birds.

I have never posted a video before, so we'll see how this whole thing goes.

What else has been going on? My mind has been in shambles at times as I try to cope with living in a small community, lots of schoolwork and no direct competition.

The small community is fine, but I have a hard time finding an outlet... as we are all in this together. some folks have ways to release and "escape" from time to time, but I have felt trapped at times. Yeah, I signed up for this and I will get through it too... but it is hard! Whatever doesn't kill you only makes you stronger.

About the schoolwork... I just have to wrap my head around doing it. Lots of planned social engagements, institute events, meetings and new stuff coming up all the time. Thus the work sits and then gets even harder to do with less time to do it. The best bet is for me to remember that if I am idle, then I probably have something I should be doing!

No direct competition... I suppose sometimes we grad students compete against each other for resources or for face time with institute people... sometimes in class or during projects. And of course folks want their projects better than the next person's/group's... but mostly the work is done to make people feel proud of themselves. There is no real competition... and that is pretty awesome! Especially because we are learning about collaboration- which is often more productive... the issue for me is that I am a competitor.

I don't want to compete with colleagues about resources, jobs, etc. In fact, we are all planning to go different ways after this, so there is no real competition. But what I yearn for is a competition.... like a basketball game, like a soccer match.... some sort of dance of bodies... some sort of physical adjustment and athletic jostling for position or fighting to get the ball. I don't know if it is as simple as physical contact with others... I think it is more of an athletic characteristic waiting for an opportunity to perform.

I have been working out a couple of days a week. I haven't been as consistent as I'd like, but i do my best. And with my limited exercises, time, equipment, and routine, I have managed to see a difference in my body. It has taken nearly three months to see any difference, but now that I can notice muscle definition and overall body health, I am encouraged to keep at it. The hardest part about exercise and stretching is that one never knows if it is working properly... it takes a lot of time to actually see results. At least for me!

that's all for now. so much work to do!

GRAPHIC BLOG--- gross pictures!

2011-01-25T14:47:00.004-08:00

Here are only two of the hundreds of pictures that were taken when we skinned and dissected a salvaged river otter.

I would like to say that this was roadkill and that I got a permit from the Wash St. Dept of Fish and Wildlife to do this and that if others are interested in this type of stuff, please get the right permits or licenses... it isn't hard, especially if you are trying to do the right thing.

I hope to finish the skinning process soon, but it is back in the freezer in the meanwhile. We all worked hard and put in about 6 hours of cutting, studying, talking...

The smell was intense... in fact, the smell of musk lingered in my nostrils for two days afterwards and raspberry jam, whereas it is delicious, presents a slight resemblance to otter blood... it was a very humbling experience to do this work and I am very happy to have studied by experience...

And by now I have used up enough space on the blog, so that the pictures weren't the first thing you saw!

Pulling back the skin while it is being cut off of the carcass

Splaying open the skin, taut, in order to scrape the fat, muscle and membrane. This was taking forever so we ended soon thereafter.

Family Reunion: Grandparents' 60th Anniversary! Part 1 of 3

2011-01-07T10:33:00.003-08:00

Welcome to the Party! Let's celebrate.

The royal couple. 60 years (to the day) and still at it!

Saba delviers a nice speech for the occasion. Grandma Pooh (yes, like the bear!) is getting ready for hers.

Here's the Cake.

Nearly ALL Strich family cousins. We are missing Dave and a couple of youngin's from Berkeley and Phoenix. From Saba's side we are 7/8 and then two from Great Uncle Bob's side. [From L to R: Matthew, Sharon, Jake, Rachel, Jason, Aaron, Steven, Me, Nathan]

Family Reunion: Grandparents' 60th Anniversary! Part 2 of 3

2011-01-07T10:22:00.003-08:00

At Dinner...
Just the four of us- OC represent (and a new transplant to the Pacific Northwest) !

Dirtay South (ATL, DC, Virginia) and another new PacNorwegian!

Princeton, NJ where you at! (and now London)

San Diego cousins throw it down too!

Family Reunion: Grandparents' 60th Anniversary! Part 3 of 3

2011-01-06T14:53:00.008-08:00

Photo shoot! Seven cousins... only missing David Katz! (L to R: hailing from SoCal, ATL, and NJ)

With our grandparents

My immediate family and grandparents

Hill (our photog) and I have been friends for... gulp... 15 years!

WA, not LA

2011-01-05T17:11:00.004-08:00

Not necessarily a permanent change, but definitely the current one. Hey, I needed a new license anyways!

Pix stolen from Kate: C10 Winter Dip

2011-01-04T23:09:00.003-08:00

Thank you Ms. Rinder for sharing these pictures!

To celebrate winter birthdays, we jumped into a freezing cold lake, in freezing cold weather!

We are strong enough to do this.

Notice that I am the first one out. Maybe a wuss or maybe a good move.

Posing after the plunge

December and January Nature pictures 2 of 2

2011-01-04T22:53:00.004-08:00

There are ten total photos in two posts:

Coho Salmon (Oncorhynchus kisutch) that made its run up the Skagit, laid its redd and clung on until it eventually died and floated to the surface. More nutrients for the upriver forests.

This Belted Kingfisher (Ceryle alcyon) yelled at me for getting too close and flew away twice!

Clear view of El Dorado peak

Rain-on-snow event caused a deluge of Sourdough Creek which filled the Texas Dip (6 feet of clearance under the road) and then the road to the ELC. We couldn't cross there and they couldn't leave for a day, until the debris was cleared.

The same event caused excess sediment flow from Stetattle Creek (behind my house) and there was a clear line made when it mixed with the Skagit under Diablo Dam. Pretty cool.

December and January Nature pictures: 1 of 2

2011-01-04T22:46:00.003-08:00

Second set of pictures:
Studying layers of snow in a 1m deep snow pit

Yours truly holding a rather heavy 30cmX30cmX80cm column of dense Cascade concrete

Mt. Baker, taken from the southwest (ridge just south of Table Mountain)

Mt. Shuksan notices the Mares tale clouds cruising east over its head... low pressure system is moving in and storm is on the way.

My second run of the season. Epic run through some thick, but untracked snow.

Happy new year

2010-12-30T15:00:00.003-08:00

So, another calendar year passes and the grey hair on my head can no longer be avoided.

I turned one more year closer to 30, saw my family during a 60th anniversary party for the grandparents and went to a wedding of a good friend from high school.

In the abstract, time is passing. Friends adventure off into the world- jobs, spouses, children. Family members do the same. Other folks lose their hearing and some have more difficulty moving than they used to. Time (which really doesn't move) moves on and memories are all that remain left in its wake.

For a more "downer" post, but philosophically uplifting(?):

I am 29 and have nothing to show for it. I have memories that only I can see. I have stories which need others' ears to be heard. I have the ability to communicate in many languages but can't talk with myself about it (or at least I can't respond without being considered crazy!)

I have no Things to show for my time, less some saved-up money from previous work.

It is a bit depressing because I have grown up exposed to the idea that one must have things to show for his work. A car, a house, a kid, a spouse. Perhaps an occupation or some advanced education.

And I can think myself into a rut when I compare myself to friends and others who have Things, not NoThings. I think I am behind, I think I should take a debt to pay off, I think I am lonely without a partner.

I think and think and think... and I could be really upset. But being upset only comes from a heart that is being ignored... not from a brain that is not being listened to.

I have started to "feel" instead of think. The heart is the speaker of feelings, not the brain. The brain is for working and accomplishing tasks. But the heart is for leading my life and when it does, when I leave space for it to speak (and more importantly, space for me to listen!), when I let my brain's word-train ramble off down the track (as it always does), when I sit on the side of the track and listen to the soft murmur of my heart, I know that I am moving in the right direction.

Sometimes I have to jump on the train to gain some ground faster, but I have to get off at the right stations to make sure I shouldn't transfer. And while I am waiting, perhaps it's important to walk around the station area, get a meal or a cup of coffee and ponder for a little while. It's a good opportunity to talk with some locals about what makes them tick. How are they doing on this particular day? It's nice to have a conversation with someone who doesn't know me or my story. They want my business, I want their service and we use the fluid time to live the moment... unless they are running around all crazy like during the lunch rush!

The time train rattles on. Fortunately there is email and telephones to help us meet up in the same places at the same "official" times. And while I could go on with the abstract time train continuum discussion, and indeed I could extrapolate much more on this topic, I just got a call from Drew and we are going to talk business on the golf course.

(Actually, it's gonna look like us laughing and causing trouble while playing mini golf. That is how business is done in the environmental education field!)

Cheers,
Dave

Fotos to compliment my last post

2010-12-19T08:08:00.003-08:00

Chef Shelby's hands at work on one of the T-day birds.

Icicles greeting visitors upon entering the Dam and Learning Center.

Tracks from the family of raccoons that live in my neighborhood.

Migrant fisherman (Bald Eagle) takes her post in a leaf-less Alder, waiting for signs from the salmon!

Almost a month since the last

2010-12-19T07:44:00.003-08:00

So,
I haven't had time to blog... then I had time, but not my pictures. Now I've misplaced my camera with the pictures I really wanted to share.

But, I'm in Irvine at my parents' house, I spent a very relaxing birthday yesterday napping, eating and seeing friends. That was awesome and the dinner with my parents was incredible.... we all enjoyed ourselves thoroughly.

Since the 23rd of Nov, I helped work a Thanksgiving Family getaway at the learning center during which I helped run some programs for the 50 participants there. An eagle presentation, a Dam walk, a night hike, a tracking class as well as the participation in various icebreakers and social events, as well as the front desk! Concierge = me!

I finished the quarter's worth of projects and classes. I think my experience in Japan has helped me tremendously because I am focused and patiently grinding away at the never-ending work load. A little bit each day and I hit the deadlines with no real loss of sleep!

I have been working out a little bit too. Basic exercises and now basic pilates (thanks to my mother, the instructor!) and I'm ready to rock.

Speaking of rocks, last week massive amounts of debris came flying off the mountains and all over the roads as we experienced a rain-on-snow event. Lots of water, rocks, sediment load and trees covered the road, learning center parking lot and the highway. we were kinda trapped for two days! Fortunately it got cleaned up and we escaped.

I spent three days in transit- two with another student in my group, Codi and her husband, Jimmy who put (up with me/ me up) [hehehe]. We ate well and went birding and watched soccer. It was a nice way to unwind from crazy school life- seeing hawks, snow geese, trumpeter swans [loud bastards!], Great Blue Herons and Bald Eagles. Then a night on Bainbridge Island with Svend and Edie, a nice couple I met at the Getaway. We spoke for hours and Edie whipped up a nice meal for us. I look forward to seeing them when I get back to the Northwest.

Now that I am 29, I feel like I have reached a milestone. 10 years since I have "been on my own" and I am still not completely out on my own. Well, I suppose I am, and now in terms of financial independence and space. But I come back to my parent's house and almost consider it home. It is comfortable and nice and I like being here... for a visit!

I'll be here for a wedding, more birthday celebrations and a huge family reunion and anniversary party. Seeing friends and family will be delightful (or not). Then whisking myself back to the cold, dark north for avalanche training and skiing before my program starts again.

Quick note on the program: It is exactly where I need to be right now. I love every single second of the studying I am doing and I am slowly settling into the Pacific Northwest also. Non-profit admin and education (through the lens of environmental and experiential approaches) is the path that seems most natural to me. There are still many options for careers and paths towards which this graduate program may direct me... but they all point towards happiness and personal satisfaction. For that I am so grateful.

Happy Holidays, Merry Christmas and a safe New Year to you.

Cheers.

It has begun!

2010-11-23T11:09:00.003-08:00

After a Thanksgiving feast a week early, winter decided to start early also! We got pounded with really cold weather and a bunch of snow... awesome!

Icicles on the side of the road overtook live plants!

Grasses froze as the snow fell and the water cascaded down and ricocheted off of boulders to stick

The Camry (Eleanor) on the morning of Sunday, Nov 21... I put on chains to get to the ELC.

Quaint (and poorly insulated!) Diablo (H-4) house in the snow!

The entry gate to the ELC... covered in snow!

First snow...

2010-11-20T10:56:00.003-08:00

This is a shot from November 18th in the morning. The madness began on the 17th, but this is the picture I have for now... as I write this it is 29 degrees outside and the icicles are forming on every surface I see. It's gorgeous because many of the deciduous trees are barren, allowing me to see what actually is going on around here!

Desert Southwest 3 of 3: Reflection

2010-11-09T16:56:00.003-08:00

Has it really been three weeks since I have written on this blog? Yup. 10 days in the Desert Southwest (U.S.A.) with Hannah, Jared, Matty and Andrea.... AWESOME! Great to run that trip through one of my favorite places in the entire world. That is where the current header picture was taken.
I could write about it, but I will just post pictures instead... now that I have figured out how to deal with my lack of internet at home (again!!! ahhh).

Desert Southwest 2 of 3: Pictures

2010-11-09T16:50:00.005-08:00

I post this picture because it is the best action shot I have ever taken. Andrea jump kicking Matt while he shoots a fireball. I never saw the outcome (whether the kick landed before the fireball was delivered.) Either way, someone won the round and moved on to play M. Bison in the finals of Street Fighter II.

At the Grand Canyon. It was completely clouded over in the AM but by 3pm we were able to see across it!

At Monument Valley. This is the Left Mitten... but a little bit too small to fit my hand.

Sunset at the Moonlight Springs ranch, where we spent an afternoon emerged in the Navajo culture... we had just begun a closing ceremony during which the medicine man blessed our students and our excursion.

One of the teachers of the school reflects a moment at the Horseshoe Bend overlook. It is 1000 feet down to the Colorado River from this point... be careful not to lose your footing on the slick sandstone. One man fell to his death in front of his family a month before we were there.

Desert Southwest 1 of 3: Pictures

2010-11-09T16:15:00.006-08:00

The grottoes and amphitheatre at Bryce Point

Close-up of a Hoodoo

It's called, "Queen Elizabeth Rock." Can you see her holding the bouquet of flowers?

ALL-STAR CREW celebrating another great week!

The day after the madness, we spent an afternoon in Egypt... at the base of the pyramid in the Valley (of sin...)

Pictures

2010-10-17T10:31:00.003-07:00

Two recent shots. Autumn in the North Cascades.

from October 15th. Snow dusts the tops of Pyramid Peak!

My favorite tree (shrub) on campus. A small vine maple growing amidst a forest of Alder saplings. The picture isn't as good as the real thing... the real leaves are on fire when the sun hits them briefly from 4:58~5:18 every afternoon.

Posting for its own sake

2010-10-13T08:16:00.004-07:00

So,
No one else has posted anything recently. That's OK. But I feel as if something needs to be written. Therefore I am posting something.

And now that the cobwebs have cleared up slightly, I can add a bit more:

I have been so busy with my graduate program. I feel rather selfish and unaware of my family and friends. I am in a tiny world, in a minuscule community off into the far-flung reaches of nature in the heart of the mountains, etc. Some days are better than others but no day is really that bad! Fortunate so far I guess. It's hard to stay connected as I put in 10-12 hours a day while teaching, typing notes, keeping records and journals, being social (with my now limited capacity and ability!) and working for the institute. I don't want to let a day go by where I am not involved... except for the days when I am only resting (my Shabbat). thus, I am always tired, always busy and never engaged in the lives of my girlfriend, friends and family. I feel bad about this. I am soaking in all that I can in order to get the experience for which I came here. But it has been indeed a challenge to balance the personal life with the business/studying. I have some energy shifting to do... yet another challenge for me.

Great to see my family

2010-10-01T21:37:00.008-07:00

So, Cousin Rachel got married last weekend. She was a gorgeous bride and her husband is a terrific guy. It was fabulous to see the Strich family members who I hadn't seen in years! It took a couple moments for us to get used to our orders and arrangements in dealing with one another (stemming from many years of history, outings, events and vacations together) and then it was wonderful as usual!

I shared a hotel room with Steven and we talked as much as we possibly could have... good times. Even Jake and Nathan were hanging out in SLO, keeping in touch with us via text. Jake's messages to Steven were slightly different than the ones Nathan was sending to his dad! Ha.

Five of the cousins:

Me, Aaron, Rachel, Jason, Steven

We were missing five and some younger newbies to the clan.

I'm looking forward to Christmas Eve, when, we will have a huge family reunion to celebrate Grandma and Saba's 60th wedding anniversary. May we all stay in good health to attend!

Spiritually cleansed

2010-09-19T11:43:00.002-07:00

After a proper observation of Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur, for the first time in years, I feel ready to rock for the next year. The hardest parts will be to not curse when my sporadic wi-fi internet loses a connection and not pulverizing mosquitos that bite me.

May we all have a wonderful new year. Good Yontif.

L'Shana Tova

2010-09-07T21:49:00.001-07:00

Happy New Year... may you have a sweet and joyous year!

-From the Author

Pictures from a wonderful week

2010-09-06T09:33:00.007-07:00

Here are some pictures, way out of order, of a recent trip to southern California. Sawako and I enjoyed 10 days in sunny, dry weather!

Zebra at the S.D. Zoo. He was in the process of cooling down by rolling around in the dirt.

Said zebra threw himself to the ground!

Lazy afternoon nap
Rad Owl! Asian continental owl whose name I forgot, outside of the Bird Show.
Jaguar pacing around in the hot post-lunch afternoon

What are you Takin about?

The day before we had spent some time in Northern Arizona...

Grand Canyon at Sunset... my camera sucks, fortunately Sawako's is awesome!

Out of order... the Imperial Dunes on the Arizona/California border, highway 8. It is a new National Recreation Area. I am excited to check it out... NOT during the 108 degree summer though!

Another subpar Grand Canyon sunset picture

Yellow and green: Sawako poses in Oak Creek rest area, north of Sedona.

And back to the Grand Canyon. From a secret overlook that was not crowded!

Actually, from our first afternoon in the Grand Canyon

I had some other pictures to post, but I can't read my own handwriting as to the names of the files! Maybe another time I can get some waves and beaches pictures...

Twenty-two days later

2010-08-28T16:54:00.003-07:00

I haven't had a chance to post in a long time. It was a back-to-back situation. The Final (backpacking trip) was a nine-day endeavor in the back and front country. We climbed Kerouac's Desolation Peak and saw his lookout that spied on Hozomeen. And then some driving around the east side of the N. Cascades to see other Fire Lookouts (places and people) and the fire damage from fires over the past decade. One afternoon to reset everything, then headed to SoCal.

Sawako and I had a great week together: met at LAX, saw my family- parents, grandparents, Jake, Charlie-, Laguna Beach, HUGE waves at the Wedge, La Jolla, (the S.D. Zoo and its pandas!) and the Grand Canyon... not to mention a lot of long trains, gorgeous sand dunes and 122 degree heat in southern Arizona. Gila Bend, AZ... a town NOT to be missed if you like to bake in the shade. I felt like I was being cooked; awkward but somewhat nice after a chilly western Washington summer. Dropped her off after eight days together and then caught a flight the next day. Saw Boitano after a couple years' absence and stayed the night at her parents' friend's place on Lake Samamish.

Today I drove straight to the take-out Chinese restaurant today then back to my apartment. Leisurely packed up my car, played basketball and sit to write this. It will be a slow evening... one in which I will load up on the Thai food and pizza that I will miss during my stint in Diablo... and tomorrow morning, I will drive up to Marblemount/Diablo/the North Cascades Institute. A year of living in the North Cascades (mountains) National Park begins when I move in my things during the afternoon tomorrow and get ready for Mountain School training which starts on Monday. I am excited to start this next adventure and my emotional/personal/physical batteries are fully recharged after my wonderful 10-day vacation. Let's do it!