I haven’t blogged in over a month and a half, but it feels like forever. I have been wanting to, but without access to the internet, I haven’t written. And that is the failure. One should still write even if he has no means of sharing. An artist much create lest he suffocate in his own emotion and creativity. Recently, I was inspired to write again. It has taken quite a substantial amount of energy (loss) in order to realize this vitality of the creative flow.
Winter break was epic. I hurt my back and learned that I am indeed getting older. I thought someone had misplaced their grey hairs on my head, but I think that they may actually be connected to my out-of-shape, sitting-at-an-office-all-day body that is not capable of going from zero to a thousand in miliseconds like it used to. That was pretty depressing, but very real. Again, winter break was epic and it put much of my life into perspective
I turned twenty-eight last (oy, two!) months ago…I think a dozen of my friends and family have been married recently or are getting married soon. Some of my friends have had kids too… this starting a family thing had been so foreign and now it is in my face like sunlight. My father was my age when I was born… that is a weird feeling. And I think about the pros and cons of this eventual aspect of life… and how this bachelor for life has recently had a change of heart. Well, sometimes. It goes back and forth at this point.
I can conclude that sitting at a desk in an office is slowly killing me. Commuting by train is entertaining and productive at times, but it is also slowly killing me. Surrounded by cigarette smoke-stained suits and unhealthy businessman restaurant diets is slowly killing me. The life of convenience is so nice sometimes and I really do feel like I am at the pinnacle of the high-speed life. The Japanese way of life is so efficient that I can’t believe I have ever lived slower. The business world is so focused on money that I can’t believe that I have ever thought in terms of other importances. But this way of life, as logical and calculated as it seems, is a false sense of life that is slowly killing those involved; as it has slowly been killing me.
I am forever grateful that I have had this opportunity to serve in an office position. That I have been able to work as a public servant and to wear the shirt and tie everyday. Without this experience I could never know for sure that it might not be the right life for me. But living the suit and tie reality is not for me. I have another six months to enjoy this lifestyle and then I hope that I will find some line of work that will not include it. I love the efficiency, I love the work ethic, I love the dedication; but if the focus were actually put in the right direction… so often the money leads the race and, though it can be expected, it is the wrong way. Far be it from me to tell others not to reach for it… but as we all reach, we leave more and more of the true life behind. Certainly there is a balance between being comfortable and holding back sometimes in order to respect the world that provides for us. Instead of keeping the heat set at 78 degrees in winter, how about dropping it to 68 and encouraging everyone to wear the jackets that they brought to help them survive the transit to work? How about reusing a plastic bag ONE extra time? The list goes on forever.
All I know, despite my feelings of marriage or starting a family, is that I will encourage folks to give an extra consideration to the environment. As soon as we efficiently electronize the world, someone is going to have to encourage the trees to provide air still. Maybe it can be done electronically--- synthesize oxygen from the carbon dioxide that we emit--- but I think it is critical that responsible parents and educators fill in the gaps for the youth so they can clean up the mess that we are continuing. It is my responsibility to teach a couple of people how to live more appropriately in the hopes that they can teach others too. I ask you to do your part and to teach others in saving and reusing… and to teach your kids and your parents and anyone else.
Lest I lose track of the point: This experience is exaclty what I have needed. I will never forget graduating from high school with all of my priorities in order. I feel almost as if I have blacked out for the past ten years and found myself back in the same place! Not that any of it was a waste or useless… to the contrary. Those experiences have made me exaclty what I have always been. I don’t regret a second. And I refuse to regret any other seconds that I am blessed enough to receive. 毎日、今、ここ、一生懸命に頑張ります。一期一絵。
It was written on the wall of the gym at the junior high school in which I used to teach English and play basketball: “The moment is only once in your life. Cherish dreaming, being ambitious, smiling, and companions.” 「一度しかない今、夢、笑顔、仲間を大切に」
[Ichido-shikanai, ima, yume, egao, nakama-wo taisetsu-ni] 「いちどしかない いま、ゆめ、えがお、なかまを たいせつに」。
Recently I snowboarded six days of an eight day vacation in Nagano「長野県」. This includes six different resorts and a backcountry hike/snowboard on the ridge above the Happo One 「八方尾根」resort in Hakuba「白馬」。 Resorts include: Goryu 「五竜」, Hakuba 47, HappoOne, Cortina, Norikura and Tsugaike「栂池」. At Cortina, the small resort at the end of the valley, I experienced the powder that was rumored to be true. It was said that that place boasts the highest snowfall in the area. There was so much snow that I nearly buried myself twice and I came in looking like the abominable snowman- with icicles attached to my beard. There was 120 cm of snow in one day (that is up to my waist). It reminded me of the Sierra Cement that I have known my whole life. It was a hard day, but wow was it unreal! And fresh tracks in the backcountry… there really is nothing like it. I think that I will take some avalanche awareness and training courses so that I can focus on that part of the sport. Taking a chairlift can be rather useful at times, but one run through fresh pow after a long hike seems almost more enjoyable than cruising all day through the trees…
Two weeks ago, I took three days in Miyagi「宮城県」, on the border of Akita prefecture 「秋田県」。 It was epic too… it just snowed and never stopped. I had a chance to ski also, as the sticks were pretty cheap and there were boots that fit me!
Recently I have been practicing calligraphy, after quitting a month after I first started, when I first got to Japan in Sept 2007. My teacher claims she has been waiting for me to come back... I believe her. It has been really nice to have the brush in my hand, especially after how it had frustrated me so! I have a lot to learn and quite a bit of catching up to do, but there is no rush.
I plan to go to Hiroshima prefecture 「広島県」for two days of snowboarding this weekend. And the week after, I plan to catch the tail end of the Yuki Matsuri「雪祭り」 (Snow festival) in Sapporo「札幌」、 Hokkaido「北海道」。 Then to the mountains of Niseko 「ニセコ」(like two years ago) for another run through the dry powder of the north! I’ll save some money and stay close to home for the following two weeks in order to view the plum blossoms, or “ume”「梅」, which are my favorite flowers in Japan. Then another weekend snowboarding in Hiroshima to end the season. My goal is to enjoy, to push myself, but to keep safety at the forefront of my experience. I guess I HAVE gotten older in the past ten years!
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