winding around and around, unwind

I just wrote an entry and smartly closed the box before publishing it. I sometimes get flustered and need to release. And putting the energy out there is a good thing. But being attached to the energy and creation is what causes the suffering. Had I published it, I could have justified it any way I want to and convinced myself that I was right. My ego would strengthen itself.

By creating and venting my anger/irritation/frustration at another person (partly at myself for even getting involved!) I released the madness from my mind. Maybe only a bit, but it is a start. But the attachment of that post and putting it on this blog would have been for the ego. And I really shouldn't do that kind of thing, even if it wants me to. So, in my detachment from my "art," I managed to safely begin the dissipation of negatude that had built up in my body. Had I posted it, I may have continued the negatude unconsciously.

Next step, cut the negatude off at the pass. Why have I gotten so tight lately? I feel it in my back and shoulders for shure. And I can't blame the cold nowadays, because it is beginning to feel like I forgot to turn off the sauna. In fact, there is no blame at all... the ego wants to pin it on someone else. I am missing a beat somewhere. Back to the drawing board, ne?!