Continued Pacific Paradise (a different one) and discussion of "Home"

I touched down at LAX last Sunday morning and it was overcast and ugly, whereas minutes before it had been sunny and amazing (above the clouds). But I was smiling so much, so happy to be "home," knowing the overcast, June gloom burns off by 10 or 11. So true, and Drew picked me up and drove me back to Irvine where we shot some hoops and skated (him, not me) around the park under sparkling sunshine.

So much that I want to write, so here it goes...

Drew, he is the man. And there is a link to his blog over on the right, scroll down, you'll find it. We are nearly twins. Close birthdays and similar attitudes. He is the tall blond swimmer and I am the shorter brunette runner. I was involved in many season of outdoor education and guiding after university and he went to Japan to teach English... I leave for Japan in July and he will continue facilitating in the outdoor world. We are so close and flip-flop our interests, but at the end of the day we discuss what really matters and re-charge to take on another day; we fly out of the gates before the other horses wake up- excited to be alive and fired-up to be. It's bizarre to meet someone so similar to you because they already know how your stories end, as they have already done it. But we manage to laugh at the jokes we've told each other (or that we haven't but we might as well have) and the stories we have shared too. We even laugh off the pain of being traveling bachelors despite our true sentiments to settle down... but some things just aren't possible.

How do I feel right now? I have missed summer in Irvine... it is just amazing. It is sunny and the sun is up for a while. It is a stark contrast to my night living in Santiago. Though Patagonia had lots of sun too, that was five months ago and the seasons have changed a lot for me. I am confused about summers and winters by crossing the equator so many times and then being in the mountains recently doubled it back over because the tropics and high altitude change it again. If you are as confused as I am, then I have succeeded in explaining myself correctly.

I am so happy to be home. I was somewhat depressed, despite traveling and seeing so much. But that was a very important experience. As Alan Watts reminded me, "A circular saw cuts because it has peaks AND valleys. If it just had teeth, it couldn't cut and if it just had valleys, it couldn't cut either. It needs both in order to be effective." I learned that downs are just as important as ups, as both are natural parts of life. Though difficult, I now am satisfied with the perspective I gained by living a "dark" life for the past couple months.

I am so happy to be home. I am focused and have the plan figured out. The fun part about my planning is that it always changes, regardless of the plan I've made. But now, with options, directions and doors to open, I am just excited to wake up in the morning... like this morning, my body was destroyed after playing basketball for hours yesterday, staying up late writing and reading. But my brain was wide awake with more energy than I've felt in years. And my brain forced the poor body out of bed to live a long day... and tomorrow will be even worse, I am sore already from playing soccer only two hours ago... it will hurt, but I am already excited to wake up tomorrow.

I am so happy to be home. "Home," even though I am always moving and never really have a home- temporary dwellings and places to stay, I have... but my own home, nope. I am very happy to be living under my parent's roof. It is great to spend time with my family and being around friends during such a wonderful time of year. But when I say "Home," I refer to the sense of being... at peace with myself- a connection among body and mind and soul and spirit. I am home and it has taken me a long time to get here... and now that I am here, I am even more free to travel, to go anywhere, to be free.

I have wandered since graduation three years ago and began exploring the world. It seemed like the only thing to do, at least self-consciously. Despite my only seeing a bit of the world, I have managed to meet so many people and work in so many different settings. And through all of this, I've managed to place myself exactly where I need to be. Like my father told me, "You are looking for something 6000 miles away, but you are going to laugh when you discover you've had it the whole time." I'm laughing and he's right. And now I'm laughing because this is the second time I've admitted that he's right in the past day. HAHAHAHA.

I've spent the past few days shooting hoops, playing soccer with the same crew at the JCC, pushing papers for my upcoming year in Japan and just being plain busy. This used to irritate me. To work, to go, to move so fast. But i love it now and I am super amped to be doing it. I know I will slow down and maybe feel down too. Being aware of this, however, is important and also will make me happy. Life, like the saw, can't work properly without its ups and downs. I am excited for the upcoming downs, but right now I am riding on the ups.

Welcome back to the US. Welcome Home Dave. Welcome back to life.